A restless time....

 Street party this afternoon in Bushwick. The Bushwick Starr, one of my favorite theater companies is having its yearly block party---outside their new theater, which, I hope will open by early next year. It is a five hour party---beginning at 2--- would like to get there around 4. But what about the rest of the day? restless----I think the best plan would be to go to Brooklyn around 1:30---maybe spend some time at the Center For Fiction, then take the 26 bus which travels through Fort Greene to Bed-Stuy (the new Bed-Stuy, with its coffee shops and new expensive apartments) and finally arrives in Bushwick. That is where my mind stands now---but still so much time to kill. Don't want to sit in a movie theater for two hours before the trip---so just have to work it out. Time seems to be moving very slowly on this Sunday.

Yesterday, two days after my last infusion---spent the day in the neighborhood---some reading of Tony Tanner's Shakespeare Essays in the library---love reading his vision and understanding of the works.  Reading a play by Thomas Middleton called The Witch---written and performed around 1615. Some interesting moments but very episodic and characters seem for want of a better word, one dimensional. Then back to the apartment where just about every major league game yesterday could be seen for free. Watched most of the Oriole-Rocky game---I think it gets to be too much--kept me in the apartment---not so much of a good thing. 

Final week before labor day---usually a slow week--Labor Day for me has always been a beginning of the year. I have a heavy schedule just about each day---will lead into the long Labor Day weekend--once again I will find myself on my own. Have some friends in Williamsburg whom I might call--this might be a good chance to catch up with them---remember how it used to be when South Fourth was opened---could just go there and depend on some interesting conversation. And now...?

Bushwick---In Dreams or Reality....

 So I did it! Voyaged to Bushwick yesterday afternoon. An attempt to recreate the past! Perhaps. Emerged with a totally different perception--of myself! Of the neighborhood as well, but definitely of what that "voyage" means to me after four years and the isolation brought on by the pandemic and of course, the illness.

Spent the morning with chores. The "kicked off" around 2. 1 train to 14th; L to Jefferson---not a very long trip. L full of people going to Brooklyn. Got off at Jefferson---walked to Cobra Club. Found my bartender friend Olivia at the bar---not very crowded at 3:30. Nice to check in with her. We went through the list of old friends and acquaintences we knew over the last 8 or 9 years. Hung out a bit then left for my ultimate goal of the day. To see a movie at Syndicated Bar and movie theater---a venue of Bogart Street a little bit closer to Williamsburg. Syndicated had opened pre pandemic--it always seemed like it would be meaningful to watch a movie there---the movie that I wanted to see was Shiva Baby--an independant film showing at 6. Walked the half mile or so from Cobra to Syndicated---surrounded by mostly young couples moving back and forth. Got my ticket early with no problem---the cashier-bartender was very nice. Had some time to walk on Bogart. Saw Swallow, a coffee shop I used to visit a long time ago, and the Pine Box Rock Shop bar---visited several times pre pandemic to watch baseball or football. Nice, welcoming place. Harder to go into a bar now that I can't order alcohol. Not very crowded---I don't think they would mind if I ordered a sprite---but just observed--and returned to Syndicated.

Loved the movie space venue---enjoyed the movie--an independant film about a young woman about to graduate college at the crossroads of her life. Lots of Jewish bickering and semi-sterotypical "opinions" throughout the movie, but it all worked for me. One actress in a featured role had played Masha in a production of Three Sisters that I directed in the mid-eighties. Seats have lot of room---place half filled so it was almost a private showing---sightlines excellent. The bar at Syndicated was kind of crowded when the film ended so I did not stay around---time to return to the upperwest side? Possibly.

A short walk before hitting the L. Time to take stock. What was different then pre-pandemic cityboy? Who was this new person participating in the Saturday night rituals of the neighborhood. Walking the streets of Bushwick I feltisolated--like a strange visitor aware of his difference. Don't remember experiencing that before. Is it the time...? The vision I have of myself (my hair is gone)...how I cope with the issues of the illness---that now separate me from that much younger group. There is a surreal quality to this whole voyage. Can I do it again...? Do I want to...? Thought I might get off at Bedford and wander around a bit, but actually got off at 3rd Avenue and had a tuna sandwich at a low keyed diner on 17th street. (we are in Manhattan now) Needed a different venue. Then I returned home. 

Tired today--should rest---maybe make it to Drama Book Shop or Library on 40th and 5th which is opened on Sunday. Have to be ready for tomorrow's session---will report soon.

working it through....

 two weeks later--body somewhat having problems with most recent infusion. Felt good afterwards---a little loopy as usual but good enough to work two sessions---Friday not bad also---ended up at the Geffen lobby and heard Schumann's 3rd Symphony---an amazing piece. The 4th and next to the last movement seems almost written by another musical mind, but for some reason, the 3rd movement kept resonating with me. 

Yesterday I had hopes for a movie and possibly some "hang out" time at my friend's bar, but it did not happen. After a morning of reading in the Lincoln Center Library, I was tired---not much energy for the rest of the day. At the library I read Tanner's essay on Hamlet---amazing how he pulls together all the contrasting strands in Hamlet's character and the play itself. I left feeling very stimulated---I love reading that book---but I can only take his take on one play at a time.So there should be much more to read. As the evening moved in, I thought it might be possible to see the second act of Hamlet in the park----I had seen the first act 5 weeks earlier and admired it---but I was tired--I wandered around Amsterdam between 84th and 79th---full of people---what seemed like an endless amount of couples--then just returned home. Today, much at the mercy of my what I think is an over-medicated body so I have just walked around the neighborhood. Still the evening to come---I want to leave the apartment and go somewhere--a possible free Shakespeare performance in walking distance---maybe, but who knows?

The week begins tomorrow and I think I have three sessions---should keep me busy, and I am sure my body will cooperate---I had hoped that in my free time this summer, I could return to the voyages  and something resembling the life that I had in the summer of 19, but so far that has not been possible. My friends in Brooklyn will see me---but i have to reach out---and somehow I am not doing that. Also, my energy level is so different. Will I return to Cobra club or Starr bar at some point? Hard to say---if my body can come around---well, we will see.