so after

2.5 days of subbing, and plans for jobs in the next few weeks, I find myself pretty protected in terms of finance. So why the restlessness, bob? It is hard to work a full day at Friends and then go to work with chelsea, but she is doing really well, feel a sense of excitement when i see how she is putting it all together.
Weekend---will see cymbeline, in my neighborhood tonight---that seems to make sense, and if I am not tired after that, maybe to Williamsburg, though the subways will be pretty wild, this evening. tomorrow, Adam's play, with all those I know and almost know. Lots of work next week, and the election....think I will acutally get to a movie....? is that important, still haunted by boundaries....enough!

how the horses did.....

they did okay in the cup, actually broke even---made some very good choices, and if I hadn't added on in the end, would have come out a little ahead. still, seems like I am making good betting choices. No work today, but tomorrow at Friends, actually got called twice for tomorrow (ofcourse I would have loved to been called once today) . Also, an e-mail from Glenn, who teaches Math about two more days in November. Hope to pick up some more work before long.....Yesterday had a nice conversation with Layla at Barbes, will try to return there next week....off to tutor chelsea, what else.....?

a fun......

a fun night at South fourth street yesterday, some very good conversation, left feeling very satisfied, even if the rest of the day was very weird. Today, decided to be on three races in the Breeders cup, and now I wait......Will probably return to South Fourth tonight and tomorrow, maybe go to Bembe and hang with Layla tomorrow evening; I owe her a visit.
Feeling optimistic about everything, despite not having enough work---don't quite understand why I don't want to accept DOE assignments, computer voice awfully cold, however---probably a lot will be determined by how my horses do; did okay yesterday, and more importantly, exercised option to move away, when it was necessary......later!

strange week.....

would have liked to work more than once...turned down another good school today---ofcourse I did not know that. Also added some schools in Brooklyn and the Bronx---maybe that will encourage me to take some jobs near Chelsea so it will be easier to tutor her.
Yesterday---attended the Jerome Robbins American Masters premier. What can I say? The whole thing.....did not talk to anyone afterwards---yesterday it seemed I ran around like a maniac. Had to go tutor Chelsea before the Robbins---trip to the Bronx, and then back. On the train, on the way back, as we hit Freeman or 174 street, I was standing there, practically had to restrain myself from snapping my fingers. Yes, I am proably and expert on theater at that time, but what does that mean.....now tired, not much energy to go to Brooklyn, but tonight....well, we'll see.

make this a

quick one, cityboy, two minutes to go---what!? Sheer exhaustion. Tired but miss Friends already. Busy today in the evening, after tutoring, may see At This Performance, to see Emma---good talk with my brother yesterday, got off G train at Myrtle Willoughby---interesting, does this make sense.....?

so there I was....

all last weekend preparing myself for the "slump" in work at friends, only to discover that I actually had four days work (in three days) there this week. Complete exhaustion, but worth it. What next? Nothing for next week at all, but that could change. As for the weekend, again, fraught with choices, really enjoyed that Frank Langella article in that silly blurb that I got in the mail; it made me want to see Man for All Seasons, even without the common man. Emma's evening coming up, maybe I will make it, and also the Robbins documentary. Baseball tonight? I don't know---have not been to South Fourth in a while, after my marathon there last weekend. Very heartened by the city council meeting reports and the many people who have spoken out against the Mayor's decision to run for a third term. So, the day continues.......

working at

Friends tomorrow, thank goodness, feel much more relaxed now---the weekend, many walks---took L to Jefferson Avenue stop---walked around, area seems very hispanic---circled Maria Hernandez park---then walked west to Flushing Avenue---which seems to stop Bushwick dead in its tracks---the beginning of "East Williamsburg", but certainly the end of Bushwick. Wandered around East W, lots of people out with dogs, etc---then up Bushwick Avenue to Montrose and then home, only to return to-----Williamsburg (of course) for the Paradise Lost compilation. Sunday, ofcourse, the long walk from Heights Cafe to 5th and 12 street in Brooklyn. Easy walk, took very little out of me----yesterday visited the Polo Grounds, stood outside of what was the field, traveled down to the subway, probably the first time I was there since age 13. Remember that long walk up the stairs, then up to small ramp to the ticket sellers. Amazed and put off by the abrupt transformation of harlem---another example of our powerlessness.? How will the "crisis" effect the building? Anyway, soon off to the Bronx to work with Chelsea....later.....

feel the breeze......

what an incredible day. A perfect day for all the elements inside of me to battle re plans to make. How much money to spend? How to spend it (credit card--oh no!---or real money, of which you have very little) and what is more valuable? Experiencing by watching, or by simply wondering and allowing the moment to be your guide. Continued good time at South Fourth yesterday---some interesting conversations with Genevieve and her mother, here for a 68 Bronx Science reuinon. Yesterday at Painting Center----long but got through it. Have determined that slow times at Friends may mean really seriously looking for work in DOE schools, but how much...?
Constant questions and answers, still have never really felt stronger.........

so yesterday.....

i did not teach; but I walked, and walked, and walked. One major: 113 street and Broadway to 76; one medium:145 at Lenox to 149 Grand Concourse, and then the walk from 180 street up Morris Park to Chelsea's house. Today, I feel great, body feels strong---hoped for work at Friends, did not happen, tomorrow I am there, and I will find out if I can proctor a test the next Saturday. Anyway, visited LIC to check out location of Sinatra school, if I am ever called there. Still confused: expect there to be enough work for me at Friends, not to have to look for work at DOE schools, but.......five days of not being called at Friends can seem like a lifetime. Meanwhile, continue to work with chelsea, set aside time for her---fear going to Queens to sub and then returning to Bronx to work with her, but actually should not be so hard. Time will tell.
A beginning: A man about 65 travels the 2 train around Freeman Street. White, professional, what is he doing there? Was he raised there? Is this the end of his life? Why does the life (or picture of life) there fascinate me?
At midtown library, trying to choose a book for me to read that will be "pertinent"....we'll see.

bummer, bummer....

so here I sit, at the library by Columbia, while I could be four blocks away, subbing in one of the best junior high schools in the city. Can you believe it! So first I get shafted on Friday, then my subbing for tomorrow is canceled, and now I find out that a great school called me (or atleast the computer) and I didn't go there. Calm down cityboy! Yet when will this end? How long do I have to manage my money like a hawk? All right, so you have things basically in control, but still.....this is a strong moment for me, I feel very strong, like I could do anything, and yet.......well, let us see what the future brings.......

quite a day.......

not feeling to great this morning, but now somewhat exhilirated since I corresponded with newspaperman re article about the mayor. Still not sure if I will take his advice, but feel involved. Still wondering about work tomorrow, should not forget that I took a bus from Washington Heights into the Bronx that primarily went down 170 Street. Fascinating trip! On this very dark day, the Bronx seemed very non-threatening, many streets quiet, almost deserted, a whole swath of streets that seemed to be very weakly inhabited. Very nice development around Freeman Street; seemed very tranquil---a few blocks away the apartments where the students who went to James Monroe in the forties and fifties, students to whom my father taught math to, were brought up. Could (should) have stayed longer, then a bus down Southern Boulevard to the zoo, to Fordham Road. Again, looked at the houses on Crotona Parkway, once (thirties, forties?) considered very special. Yet nothing really threatening about them or the area, which I suppose is strange, since this is officially the "South Bronx". Now in the library, probably will simply return to the apartment and wait for the possible calls at 5:00---maybe a movie after that. Glad I decided to do something different than "hang out", perhaps that is getting a little stale. Yet had a good conversation at South Fourth with a teacher named Joey--have met many interesting people there this week in the three times that I visited. The place attracts such a magnet of people, that is what makes it good.
Later payed a visit to East River, just had a beer, checked in with Erin, said hello to Corenna, whom I had met before---then returned to Manhattan to check in with the guys at 113. So that is it.....later......

What will.....

cityboy do today? How much money will he spend? Here I sit in the Bronx public library, working on the computer--but that will soon end, and then where......to South Fourth, or to other parts of Brooklyn? To Riverdale to make a bet? A ride in a bus into the "South Bronx" before I get back to Manhattan? Arrived at 207 street on the 1 train today, then walked into the Bronx, over the 207 street bridge, again got the nostalgia kick by looking at the buildings, actually a lot of advertising going on for buildings west of Jerome Avenue, bordering on Fordham Road. Anything else? Interesting article in the Times about some houses on Sheridan Avenue, an area where I visited a friend from camp in June of 1955. Still remember playing stick ball in the school yard that was accross the street from his house---ofcourse the neighborhood was all Jewish then, no sign of what was to follow, then home to find out that Gil MacDougald of the Yankees had almost blinded Herb Score. Anyway, memories continue........the rest of the day?..........

weirded out....

today, spent the first part of my early morning preparing to go to 163, and hoping that Friends would not call; then the phone---and it was a cancellation of my job at 163----so---nothing.
Will go to NYMF today at 1, then the doctor whose secratary called for a back and such check, then maybe to Danny Hoch at Hostos---should check. Yesterday, too tired to go to South Fourth after tutoring, still find the South Bronx trip on the 2 train fascinating---a longing to get off and look around, but still hard to do--too tired to take Boston Road bus to 149 street. What next for the rest of the weekend, not sure, lots of possibilities but.........

sad day.....

probably a little down about not being at Friends, but Bloomberg's announcement that he will seek a third term and the media's embracing of it is very sad. Continuous aggressive building? Is that even possible. Anyway, hope there is a groundswell of dissent and something happens to prevent Bloomberg's doing this. Still have a lot of hope; he has alienated a lot of people. Not much else, a lot to see this weekend, still will I make it to an NYMF; is it necessary? All will be revealed, Nice time at Heights Cafe Sunday, surprised at how much I enjoyed it. ...Later....