feeling better....

today, somehow, math lesson with my student really focused me---this is a slightly apathetic student who needed a lot of direction---usually work with her and a friend, this time just with her---got her to focus, really taught her something about percents---left feeling very strong, feeling has continued through now, two visits to Brooklyn since then---the first, last night to see Tamburlaine, only lasted one act (an hour and a half) very ponderous, one dimensional staging, extremely poor casting of the women---love the space, though, have to give the guy credit, he climbed the not for profit ladder very well. Interested just to see the play, but simply could not remain for another hour and a half.
This morning, tired but went to Brooklyn to BAM to buy a ticket to Iceman, got the ticket, cost $36.50, a distortion from the $35.00 tickets that they advertise; there really are no tickets that can be bought for
35 dollars.
After the library closes (early at 3 P.M. today, will return home, and then.......who is to say, it is cold, probably will leave at about 8 and make some Brooklyn rounds, the return to La Flaca for the midnight yell, of course things could change if some interesting things happen along the way, but what will they be..?
Tomorrow, centered around Ron and Liz' traditional New Years Day part, always lots of fun, lots to eat, usually talk a lot with Laura S, see if that continues, otherwise, may go to a movie after that, next two days are open, but lots of Philip Roth to read (some Updike short stories as well) and plenty of movies to catch up on, money is in a much better place at this point, see what happens......
Speaking of money, was able to buy a belt for $1.99 at a dollar store right near BRIC which Old Navy would have sold me for $20.00...amazing!

today is.....

one day before New Year's Eve, should I regard this with a sense of dread? Somehow, feelings seem to be incredibly strong at the moment, so if nothing is happening, tend to focus on tomorrow. But there is still today, a lesson, then going to see Tamburlaine in Brooklyn this evening, also plan to buy a ticket for The Iceman Cometh at BAM before the play.
Yesterday, after library visit, tried to buy a belt at Old Navy, found them to be very expensive, finally settled on one, only to find that the line at the cashier's was very long---simply bolted in frustration without buying anything---went to another store nearbye, found a belt that might work, still very expensive, but would not let me try it fully on, felt annoyed, frustrated and used, so simply left without a new belt.
Spent rest of the day at Lincoln Center library, returned home---felt a need to get out around 8, so ended up going to see the Dardennes Brothers movie, Two Days, One Night at sixplex opposite Lincoln Center. Would have liked a more expansive movie, this one very much of a "lesson" movie, even with the presence of Marion Cotillard, felt locked in to a vision that would take me all the way through, but again, more like being taught a lesson---would have liked to see a more expansive, visual movie---nevertheless chose this one. Returned home, no problems, but up at around 3, spent a good deal of time rehashing some issues in my mind, finally got to sleep after about two hours---this is where a smart phone would make a difference, could browse to my heart's content if I woke up in the middle of the night, now I am "trapped" in my own thoughts---so which is the better choice---well, the holiday will be over soon, can return to regular routine, which will be very helpful
Will report tomorrow on Brooklyn trip and Tamburlaine...

not too much...

time left on the computer, unless I get an extension (possible) so let me be brief: the adventures of Lupkin and Zipkin my made up Jewish story sits in my mind, especially the story of Zita Zipkin, the girl who at 14 stopped traffic on the Grand Concourse (even men who would never dream of being unfaithful to their wives, who slept with their wives on the couch-bed in the living room, stopped and stared at this shining example of young Jewish woman hood."
Finished the Philip Roth novel, the anatomy lesson, which is probably where this vision came from, yesterday had nice time around Brooklyn, did visit South Fourth and hung with Merlyn, always fun, then to Brew Inn for my free beer (kind of liked the place, though sort of "cleeky") then to Cobra for more football watching could have returned to South Fourth, but was tired, did return home early, afraid of "feeding the beast", but actually all turned out all right, slept well, had a dream about the Bronx (don't remember much of it now) and awoke this morning to change my social security deposit.
Not much planned for today, a possible trip to Brooklyn, but where....? One more bar before the New Year on my bar book. I don't know, for some reason I seem contented, also, don't know if my stomach really wants some more beer, still numerous left on Graham, bed-stuy or Greenpoint.
Back to Roth, he really captures the gulf between the vision of his parents, and the crazy choices accorded to his generation---parts of Anatomy Lesson very telling other parts very annoying---what next in the reading department, not sure, would love to read some Paul Auster, have Jane Smiley's new book in my apartment, probably would enjoy more reading the less serious novel by Amy Sohn, but can't seem to find it available in any library. Something about the openness of the day appeals to me, still many movies that might be palatable, but so is wondering around.....so let it happen....

so problems still go on,......

hoped that strife between police and mayor would diminish.....has it....? Library very quiet today, lots of time to visit internet----this evening will see Pocatello, then tomorrow will spend the usual day beginning at South Fourth, then possibly to Cobra, maybe use the beer book at one of the places left on it (getting rid of a lot of them----good!)
Last night, tired after day, yet insisted that I try one more bar on the beer book, chose Manhattan Inn, which is probably more of a restaurant then a bar, but for about an hour had a very nice time there. A good conversation with Blaise---musician---bartender, also met a nice couple who live nearby and gave them one of my coupons. Would like to return to the place at some point, now have about four places (basik, bedford hills, Richlane and this one) that I would like to visit again.
How many more can I do, hard to say, probably not today, that leaves tomorrow and the next three days after that---coming down to the home stretch.
Spent the early part of the day before coming to Lincoln Center at home reading and listening to music, actually found it very relaxing, should not travel much today, as I will do much tomorrow.
That seems to be all for now, obviously at home wrestling with some memories, but once outside, very relaxed and freewheeling....

christmas....

is always a difficult day for cityboy, all his favorite hang outs are out of operation, so what was he to do?
two movies...? Too expensive (later settled for one in the evening) Most of morning spent reading Philip Roth (always reliable, but have to skip certain endless passages) and listening to music, finally left in early afternoon for heavy woods, wanted to use my free beer pass, but only wanted coffee, so that was out. Had an Americano, interesting place, much more formalized then cobra, energy was nice but impersonal, can see myself returning there late at night to check out the scene, but will I...? Thought of meandering around Brooklyn by bus, but somehow idea did not stick, instead, went to Bedford, read a little bit at the Bedford bean (like that place) and returned home, lazed around until 7 and then went to see African Queen at Huston retrospective. A little hokey, maybe I expected more gravitas, but Bogart and Hepburn are great to watch, and Hepburn, particularly, makes a remarkable transition from held back sexless wall flower to Bogart's sex honey. Still, left a bit unsatisfied....
Wednesday evening went to south fourth and hung out with Merlin and a few theater friends, enjoyed conversations, walked a possibly inebriated female (she wasn't) to a taxi, just to make sure she did not collapse, and then returned to South fourth.
Would like to use the bar book a few times before 12/31, but wonder if I will---today might go to La flaca in evening, have not been there for a while, but should also go for a drink at one of the bars, still stuck in Manhattan until 6, well it will work itself out....

today is the....

beginning of my "being on my own" week, well you know what that means, don't you? will have to work though structure with movies, bars, plays, etc, and keep a solid eye on the money spent. To make it worse it is raining, which may inhibit my traveling on today, but since i want to visit Merlin at south fourth this evening, it could be a problem. Hate to be held in. Still, a decent amount to read (thank God for Brooklyn Noir that I got from gratitude yesterday) Maybe if Friday is a fairer day, will take a nice walk through Brooklyn, beginning at the Park and going East (I think) Of course you could also begin at the Park and walk south into Ditmas Park. Ah, choices, choices. well we will see.
Yesterday, after library returned home in preparation for the evening's long (and of course beautiful) opera, Die Meistersinger. Liked my seat, mid family circle, almost had row by myself, met Kim and Clint there, moved down for third act to orchestra, nice, expected the sound to be worse, but it was very good, still, happy to be in family circle, kind of like the distance---gives me a little more time to reflect, as the music soars upward.. Certainly it is a great opera, its most exciting moments are truly elevating, there are also some spots that I simply waited for to be over---it is very long, still Levine seemed to be completely in control last evening---the orchestra, of course, sounded great, and the singers were on a very high level. Want to get to the Met a little more, but for what...?  Could easily see a play every day during January, that is the problem I will be faced with.
Just received more time on the computer---good! Still trying to figure out whether any of my beer book bars will be open tomorrow, don't want to go trekking around Brooklyn in the cold, only to find out that every place I can get a free beer is closed---no poetic justice in that---anyway, should move on to other sites, will report on my "christmas alone" and how I handle it, on Friday....

good morning.....

after lesson, wandered again slowly through what you might call the "south end" of Crown Heights, really fascinated with the streets there, the changing architecture, the art deco apartment houses, the houses of my youth, the memories they evoke, am so greatful to cousin Kara for creating a situation where I have to be out there, look forward to many more long walks, both east and west (and south to Church), many bus rides (the east new york avenue bus, for one) and more explorations. Also visited Gratitude, the new coffee place on Rogers, great and mellow new place, perfect quiet energy---was able to take a book from shelf called Hard Boiled Brooklyn, good short mystery stories, situated around the geography of Brooklyn. Have read a few so far, very good. Hope to return to Gratitude much in the future, and do more explorations.
Yesterday evening, very tired yet saw Dying for It; went because my friend Ben was in it, fairly superficial evening, no gut, good actors but they could do just about anything, simply watched them key their energy into this, nothing new about it. Afterwards went out for a drink with he and another friend, they talked mostly about the Bats, enjoyed it nevertheless.
Tonight, have finally taken the big plunge: Meistersinger, just got a ticket (not a standing room place) and hope to see the whole thing. Should be a nice set up for tomorrow, and keep me occupied tonight.

city, steeped in...

pain and confusion over the death of the two innocent policemen on Saturday in Bed-Stuy. I am as frustrated as anyone else. of course, protests should continue, but people should try to look at both sides rationally. The two may have been  great cops, the kind of cops we want all cops to be. Certainly officer Ramos seems like a very sensitive man. We will see how this develops, just puts an added seriousness to this season, quite frankly I don't think anything is wrong with that.
Rest of weekend interesting---really good time at Assembly at Friends, then lots of conversations with alum and regular students---had a nice talk with Claire about participating in day of discussion, more to follow after the vacation. Left Friends feeling very strong about my identity there.
Saturday, did go to Bushwick (very untouched by events in bed-stuy, not that far away. Saw the "Philidelphia" event at Starr, warm, fuzzy a bit voyeuristic---enjoyed first act, felt too tired to stay for second (also did not want to hear another monologue about a person's "life". Short time in beer bar, not much happening, returned home, tired. Yesterday a good day, spoke to David in morning, then left for South Fourth, spent much of day there, good conversation with Sharon and Harlo, Merlin will be bartending xmas even, so will probably drop by---on the way home met former student Ama T between trains, nice conversation with her---first time seeing her since she graduated---then returned home, today will see play at Atlantic, say hi to Ben, hope to spend more time with him at some point, that is all, things are different but can't quite articulate how.....

moving towards.....

the final possible day of work, for some reason, feeling anxious re money matters, have a little less to spend on theater and such as I expected, of course, all this can change if there is a lot of work in January, but who knows..? Realize that the "experimental theater" groups that I follow will be doing something almost every day in January and February so what does that mean  as far as money...? Funny, most of this anxiety began when I considered shifting my checking account to Chase because there is some bonus money involved (quite a lot, actually) and then I began to consider the gaps in possible time. Oh well, I am always a little too overcautious, still have a decent amount of money at ready for me if I need it, though it will come in at different times.
Yesterday, after library, simply returned home and spent most of the afternoon and evening sleeping, really needed this rest---feel much better today, cold seems to have gone away. Apartment cleaned yesterday by my long trusted cleaner Sheila, amazingly enough she began cleaning for me inn 1984 (that is really the truth) anyway it was probably easier to rest with the apartment having the appearance of normality coupled with Micah's really nice e-mail earlier in the day.
Tonight, after the Assembly...? Going to leave it open, even though there is one play that interests me--still not sure how strong I will feel, might go to Brooklyn and "hang" but it is so cold out, that the trip becomes
too bothersome--lots of movies around, if cityboy can't afford theater, tomorrow will try to get into theater at the Starr (my home away from home) and Sunday, hope to make it a travel day, to check in on all my friends in that borough whom I have not see in a long time.

so I...

screwed up my courage this morning and sent Micah Morris, who hires me for the language department an e-mail expressing my anxiety about not being called; he responded with a really great e-mail; see, cityboy, there are actually moments in time when whole departments simply don't call in sick. It's that slippery slope that a sub can never be sure of, but it as great of him to respond the way he did, can sleep a little easier now, I hope.
Yesterday, worked with Genesis, afterwards experienced a great deal of fatigue, both stomach problems and a bad cold, returned to the apartment and simply tried to rest for the rest of the evening, no trip to Williamsburg, or wherever. Tonight will probably be more of the same, body feels langorous, doubt if it will want to do much traveling.All this comes after about five days of excess activity, culminating with my travels in Brooklyn on Monday (a few long walks) and perhaps overeating on Tuesday. Stomach not accepting much, but probably one day more will make it all work itself out. Want to go to the Assembly tomorrow, see the alums, hang out with people that is my only plan so far. Saturday might be very active, want to go to Bushwick Starr in the evening.
This morning,attended Christmas Assembly at 153, Genesis' school, really quite amazing---very well done, nice to see the kids again, school seems very well organized.Glad I attended, really revelatory in some ways.
Computer time is rushing by, will stop now.....

are things looking....

up? Not really, had good time at the concert yesterday, again all were friendly, but no work today either. Is it just my imagination or is there really some attempt to "remove" me from the school? Hard to say, have not had a slow two weeks like this since, really 2006. Will give it two weeks in January, and then.....am kind of in a fog at this moment......will see Genesis this afternoon, then not sure, but probably will take the beer book to Brooklyn and try one place, then head over to South Fourth to see people and offer them parts of the beer book. Need to be around people, tonight, not see something. Genesis has requested that I see her dance tomorrow morning at her school, and if there is no work, I will go.Better than sitting home, listening to the radio, while I wait for library to open to get at computer. Really getting tired of talking radio heads on WNYC---do they really stand for anything, everyone running in place.Not much else to report, pleased with my work with the children, aside from that,,,,

Still continue....

to have no requests to work from Friends, went to pick up check yesterday, everyone very friendly, yet toll is being taken---sometimes anxiety is very strong---feel a need to do something but what...? Will go to concert tonight....hopefully things will be better soon....
Friday: first performance of Flako's piece really went very well---everything that seemed difficult in the tech jelled rather smoothly, did a lot of memorizing and practicing of my poem while show was on, delivered it adequately, but Flako was pleased. Definitely felt a greater bond with the people in the cast (this really improved on Saturday). Went home early because I had a lot of work ahead of me on Saturday, was anxious but got through the night.
Saturday: did my four lessons, tired but got to Bushwick on time. Waiting time before the performance was less but everyone seemed very friendly and supportive, felt good being part of a group of "Players" (this is an exaggeration, I know, but it really did feel like that) Felt much stronger in my poem, really defined it on Saturday---had some good talks with some of the Bushwick staff, promised to return for next week's project and left feeling very good.
Sunday: went to Romeo and Juliet at friends, really exceptional, Steve has a great sense of flow and environment---acting good all around, hope I will be able to tell the students when I see them.
After that, rejected Brooklyn, went to watch football at Standings, nothing much, finally ended at La Flaca, where Tom and new waitress Judy were very nice to me.
Yesterday went to the school to pick up check----then went to Brooklyn on the B---destination, Brooklyn Avenue near Lefferts. Got off on the Prospect Park station, even though it as dark , felt fascinated by the journey, long to go out there again and go say, from train station to maybe even as far east as Utica, as for south as  well maybe even Newkirk. Want to see how the neighborhoods connect. Walked an amazing amount, legs feel incredibly strong today.
That's it....three more days until the vacation, so at least there will be no worries at that point. Maybe more enlightenment shed on situation at Concert---good to see the kids perform.

yesterday at.....

Bushwick, attended a long tech of the show that Flako is doing at the Starr. Did not get to read my poem, the one I am performing Langston Hughes' Genius Child but on the train coming back, I memorized it. First time in a long time I have memorized something to show to people.Excited about presenting it tonight, and tomorrow night, hope I remember it. Will be interesting to see how the whole show comes together, who is there to see it, etc. and if I can make my 12 or so line poem effective. Very tired during the whole tech, managed to understand what is going on, however. Was not called to Friends today, so can rest a lot, while I wait to get to Bushwick. We are supposed to be there at around 5:30, but that is rush hour, will probably go in (via J not L) a little earlier, maybe leave my house around 3. Not a bad day to move around, anyway.Can't fathom what I would feel like in the presentation if I had worked today, but on the other hand, disappointed at not being called. Is it possible that for the last two weeks there have really been no absences by the faculty?
Got a nice e-mail from director of show Steve re my ticket for Sunday, really looking forward to it, also will go to Concert on Tuesday night and of course final Assembly before Christmas---always good to be at and say hello to alumni.So I will be around, work or not, similarly, I will ask to be included in the day of discussions at Friends in January, as part of the community.
Body feels very loose, perhaps this is because I have not had to concentrate it at school.
Tomorrow will be a busy day---should still have enough energy for the evening (second) show at the Starr.
Other cast members and tech people were friendly last night, but no real bonding, probably because I was tired and annoyed, nevertheless learned the poem in my tired state, returning from Bushwick on the L train.
Will report on that probably tomorrow, see what happens....
The poem, Genius Child, is great, by the way, so happy that Flako picked it out for me to read.

many answers to

my post in Talking Broadway yesterday afternoon about Allegro, almost all of them are constructive, thank God. Have a little bit more to say myself, but not sure if I want to continue it. Yesterday, not much until lesson, then went to Friends for a basketball game, felt very welcome there (still no work today) and looking forward to the play on Sunday and the Christmas Assembly next Friday. A few other events as well (have to check out date and time) Afterwards went to Sunburst to finish reading Mary Gordon's short story about Thomas Mann, she makes some really good points about commitment or lack of same, just as I was about to leave, so Taku, class of 2009, one of my favorite students in  all my years at Friends. He and three other guys from the class now live in Bushwick, and we talked for about 10 minutes, discussed protests among other things, really good conversation, hope I can continue it soon. Afterwards headed down to Burp Castle
to visit with my bartender friend Erin, good conversation, soon joined by a friend of hers named Anna, who lives in Flatbush, not far from one of my students. Talked with both of them mostly about the state of the city and different neighborhoods and how they have changed over the past few years (and have they ever!) Left feeling really upbeat, nice trip home, and slept right through the 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock time period in which I often get up and feel distracted. Woke up feeling quite mellow---not so much now, a little restless as I sit here in Mid Manhattan library.
But the fact that I am not working means more energy for tonight, the "dress rehearsal" for the extravaganza at Bushwick Starr that I am taking part in this Friday and Saturday. Also my be able to stop off in one or two other places in Brooklyn, maybe even sing some Karaoke (but that might be too much) Anyway, the weekend beckons, we will see what the Bushwick Starr experience brings (could be very interesting)

saw Allegro last night....

evoked a tremendous amount of feelings in me----so much of this music is from my childhood or thereabouts. It is truly beautiful music, first rate Rodgers and Hammerstein ( terrific lyrics). Doyle's production is diametrically opposed to the one I saw in Astoria last spring---want to write about it on talkin broadway, will I...? Also a  few major omissions. Wonder if I know anyone else who saw it, should be the last show that I see before my "stint" at Bushwick Starr this weekend. Hopefully tiredness will not ensue, if I work on Friday. Have not worked now at Friends in a week, feel strange, will go to basketball game today after Genesis, also the play on Sunday. After that, not sure, should visit my friend Erin, who did the 1963 show that at NYU that I saw in early October, assume that she is working at Burp Castle. If not, well, always a trivia game somewhere around (Pine Box Rock Shop) or somewhere similar. Body feels very rested...will check in later....

unique day, in...

that there is no subbing or lessons. Sense of freedom, kind of nice, even for this motley weather. Just got a facebook notification from Sibyl about a reading at HERE this afternoon---will probably go, seems like a constructive thing to do and a good chance to touch base (though probably briefly) with Sibyl. Sorry that I cannot see her play at Dixon this Saturday, but have to do (of course I want to) the project at Bushwick.
Just returned from Barnes and Noble where I finally read the poem that Flako assigned to me---intense--but I like it. Also read several poems (i am becoming more attracted to them as a whole) at Barnes and Noble, best one, very intense and horrific by Wilfred Owen called Disabled. What happens after the Reading...? Not sure, weather may define my choices, maybe check out Allegro at cheap prices...tomorrow back to normal, we will see.

so what happened....

was I did not get to see Frank's movie, too tired, and worried that the rush back to City Center might be too much, instead, after library  rested, then went to see Vito's play. Not the name of it but it might have been, first time seeing Vito in about 22 years, said hello afterwards, he was very nice, did recognize me, we talked a bit about some mutual friends and also how sad it is that at this point in time, it is impossible to take a successful play at a not for profit theater and create an off Broadway run of it. Sure this play could have moved on for a good six months if managed properly.
Afterwards went for a beer and french fries at the Emerald Inn, had nice conversation about opera with Felipe, who happens to be the son of Renata Scotto. Seems like a good guy, hopefully more conversations to follow.
Sunday, wandered around Flatbush then bus to Flushing and Bedford, walked the rest of the way to South Fourth, quite a walk--good time there, some good conversations---felt it was time to leave and planned to go to Cobra, but felt tired, that walk took a lot out of me plus it was cold, so took L home. Fell asleep relatively quickly, then awoke around 3, full of energy---how to deal with it---difficult, nowhere to go with my energy---this is continuing, have to make some moves at some point--maybe should stay out even if I approach exhaustion, still no word from Friends, which also might have something to do with restlessness, still other aspects of life going fairly well, not hard keeping an even keel---holiday break coming soon, will bring some....

not much to say.....

hectic day today, going both to Videology for showing of Frank's moving, and then to play at City Center. Of all days to begin at 7:30, why did they have to pick this one. Plus, it is raining. Glad to see that protesting has continued. Yesterday, went to FUREE meeting, long but meaningful, after that aloft in Park Slope, walked down fifth to Freddy's where I had a nice sandwich and a beer. Nothing meaningful happened there, talked to no one (except the guy managing the food), could have sat in on a nice band, but was discouraged because no other listeners were in the room--still it was opened, could have stayed but did not, found myself tired when I left--right to subway, fell asleep at home quickly, but was in an ornery mood during the night when I awoke. Why...? Was I really disappointed in the lack of "action" at Freddys? Anyway, night moved into morning and mood improved...full of energy today, this is good, but lots of things going on next weekend, figure I can navigate them all---still a busy time, we will see,,,,

so the protests.....

continue, certainly from what I heard last night as I was resting (needed a second day after Friends and Genesis to get my wind back) Good to hear that so many are becoming involved. Would have loved to attended South Fourth party yesterday evening (can it really be eight years since I found the place---amazing!) but simply too tired. Feel good today, after lesson will go out to Brooklyn to participate in first FUREE meeting in a long time. Wonder how that will go? After that.....not sure, Brooklyn is totally available to me, but it is cold. Also have to find something to read for the trip. Tomorrow, maybe try to get into Father in the afternoon, if not check out Frank's movie at Videology at 5, then back to the city to finally see By The Waer---which, of course, starts at 7:30, not 8, tomorrow evening. Sunday will mostly be  rest day, I think, but things change so quickly around here...you never know.

physically exhausted....

after yesterday, in which I had a full schedule at Friends and then a lesson with Genesis. Mentally exhausted after hearing about the Grand Jury's refusal to indict the police officer, listening to the Lehrer show (annoyed by the bombasticity of the two guests, and then going on Facebook. What can be done...? Something important is to encourage my friends who are posting to get together as a group to discuss there role in this as citizens and people in NYC. There is a certain horror at understanding that the "benign" world that you are living in, giving one a decent sense of privilege, as being mirrored by a horrible world in the same city. So I have said my peace but do hope to encourage some of my friends to start discussion groups re our part in this.
Not much else to report, will probably not see Susan-Lori Parks' play this week, seems very crowded, will try probably on Saturday anyway, also will try to see Frank's movie, and the play at Ars Nova---MTC.
Tonight, if I am rested, will go to South Fourth party---not a great deal to celebrate I am afraid, but still will go, because the place has meant so much to me over the last seven years. Don't forget to bring Beer Book...

Feeling a little......

annoyed and discontented at this moment, everything seems hassled, what do I mean by that? I mean a sense of constriction as I try to work out my day. Last night, tired after lesson, slept for a while, then went out to have an expensive (but decent) blt, then some yogurt, then back to apartment. Did not want to go to a bar, was that a mistake...? Better night last night, but still not that much of an improvement. Tomorrow will be a hectic day, as the eighth grade at Friends will wear me out, then the tutoring. Will I make it? I think so, but does that effect my behavior after lesson (possible) this afternoon. Still would like to see Father at the Public, like to use the beer bargain folder, like to give some away, like to....you see where this is going..
Philharmonic playing a relatively unknown Dvorak symphony this weekend, wonder if I will have time to see it. Would like to write something lyrical...sensitive, at least a memory that sticks in my mind...but guess I will have to work it all out...later....

feeling a little...

bit better this morning, after a strange, and perhaps unnecessary night---but just received word that unemployment money has gone through, and that I will be at Friends on Wednesday. Also, just reserved an expensive (for you, city boy) ticket for By the Water for Saturday night, but felt that it was important to see it, and in light of current monetary situation, was do-able. Now, only need to see Susan Lori-Parks' play at the Public to feel that I have seen those plays that I wished to. Also, meaningful because I get to say hello to Vito Ryginis, a guy who I hung out with about 20 years ago in Brooklyn, at the bar on Dean and Court..
At any rate, things seem to be looking up.
Last night, unaware of this morning's outcome I returned to the apartment around 6:30. Spent a nice day at South Fourth and Cobra, had good conversations at both, felt good upon leaving but tired. Had food waiting at home for me, over ate a bit, and then rested. Not much energy, but not really a good idea. Restless, lots of moving in and out of sleep from 9 on, a few very strange dreams (one in which I am trying to tutor in a brownstone, but I think I am checked out)---anyway, feel that I drained my resources. Have to remember that sometimes I need to stimulate myself out of the house (movie, beer) even if I am tired. Kind of moot now, but important to remember, especially with the holidays coming up.
Today, after lesson have the time free. Maybe contact Hannah and see if she is playing trivia tonight at the strange dive bar around Meeker Avenue. Or perhaps a movie, not really sure. Could also explore with my bar book, which incidentally, I forgot yesterday---could have given some of those coupons away, but did not. At any rate, should be celebrating my "returned" money, will see how that evolves...