Long Time....

Amzing! A little over five weeks since I have written a post! Why? For some reason I did not feel like writing my thoughts (I.e.cnflicts) down, and there were many of them. At times overwhelmed by what my government is doing--feeling enraged, but not sure where to go with those feelings. New York, in my opinion, could really be called "disconnect city", as so many things are happening here, gparticularly in the arts world, that seem totally disconnected to what the government is doing---how our leaders are behaving---I don't have to elaborate any more, you know what I mean. And yet, the "privilege" of being able to disconnect is what allows me to think about my choices, when I am not tutoring. It is so easy to immerse myself in the worlds that I follow---theater, movies, sports--and pretend that everything is all right. Of course there is city politics as well---I try to follow that closely and stay involved.

Yesterday, took a walk in the afternoon, north on Broadway to Barnes and Nobles, where I browsed for about an hour---of course did not buy anything---will try to get the books that interested me---about ten or twelve of them, out of the library. That is the way I do it now. On the way back to the apartment, I signed the petition for Kennedy's grandson; then had a nice conversation with the gentleman who was holding the petition. A shorti conversation, but could see that I really held his interest in my dialogue. Afterwards I felt fulfilled---realized that I could have many such conversations if I found the right milieu---but I don't have one now. So where do we go from here?

Sunday morning--the last Sunday before my next infusion---which means that next weekend, I have to prepare myself to be "imprisoned" in my apartment as the effects of the chemo integrate themselves intosmy body. A friend of mine is appearing in a play in Sunset Park at 3. Want to go there---all I? Have not seen a play since before Thanksgiving---absurd since off and off off Broadway are overloaded with theater projects. Yet something stops me---a lot of time it is just where I I am physically---a stamina check, you might say, but there is something else as well---a  sense that some of my friends in the performance world have forgotten about me---and I am much more on the outside then I might like. These days find more excitement reading plays, then possibly seeing them---at least that is what I think. Will I make it to Sunset Park to see my friend's work? We shall see.