Friday 10/28 first post in almost two weeks

 Alot has happened. But I want to focus on my energy, or lack of same. Yesterday I visited my blood oncologist, who supervises my treatment. The news was good--they are comfortable with my status--I simply must contnue the three week infusions and pill medication as I have been doing for the past few months. They are pleased, will wait for the results of my next ct scan in early January before deciding the next move---assuming that there is one. Meanwhile my energy has been eratic---usually in the mornings, like this morning, my energy seems normal---can do or go almost anywhere, but that is subject to change at any moment. Yesterday, feeling really good as I returned from the doctor's I found myself almost immediately in need of sleep. And then waking up, the energy was less---gone was the sense that i was as strong as I was pre pandemic. Ah, yes, the summers of 2018 and 2019---still a sense that I could walk anywhere---long distances, without tiring. How many walks through Brooklyn, from Bushwick into Bed-Stuy, from BAM to 5th Avenue and 16 street, up and down Cotelyou Road, then south on Coney Island Avenue to Newkirk---streets that if my father and mother had taught in Brooklyn, I might have been raised on. But now, mt body, so different has to be carefully managed. Last night I reminded myself that my life centers around my tutuoring; I now have at least one student every day of the week--have to make sure that I am primed for that. Yet I want to leave the apartment---tired of waiting around until 3 or 4 when I commence my travel on the 1 train to the two upper Washington Heights libraies that I tutor in. This afternoon just one student at around 4; should get out before then instead of just staying in the apartment watching time move slowly. We, we will see.

Monday evening, a party in Brooklyn at Jack---the theater-community space situated where Clinton Hill merges into Bed-Stuy. In honor of its founder---Alec, who is stepping down after 10 years. I wanted to go to show my appreciation for his vision and the space in general. How many performances, not to mention a few important forums have I attended at that space? It is where I met Imani, the leader of BAN, an organization that, pre-pandemic, I was part of for a lot of events. Getting off the C at Washington Avenue, walking east along Fulton for a few blocks I felt a calm and gentle energy unlike anything I feel on the upper west side. Yes, I know, Fulton around that area is now saturated with new luxury buildings that only cater to one class of people, nevertheless, I felt so much "happier" there (for want of a better word)  and calmer as I walked to the theater. Party was fun---had some good conversations, but it was those three or four blocks to the theater that really re-defined me. 

Tasks for today---maybe buy some undershirts--that is about it. I wonder if I will have enough energy to spend the evening out of the apartment after my one hour of tutoring. So that is what we will find out.