of Beethoven and Pinochiio

An odd couple if there ever was one. But in the space of an hour, they were juxtaposed in my life. How? This afternoon on youtube i was able to find a performance of Beethoven's first piano trio, Opus 1, number 1. It is a truly beautiful piece, very controlled, hardly an "early' work. I love the dialogue between the three instruments as they act off each other. Beethoven wrote two more in that group (opus 1). I should really make an effort to hear the other two.
     Later, I was shaving, prior to my going out for a cup of coffee. All of a sudden, a song "Little Wooden Head" from Pinnochio crawled into my head. How? I had sung it when I was cast as Gepetto, the puppet's father at Camp Towanda, as a nine year old, in the summer of 1953. I remember standing on stage, with the camper playing Pinnochio, his name was Johnny Mage--he was very bright--lived in Manhattan, and was a high end achiever. I think he ended up a very successful lawyer (hopefully an idealist)  So there was my seventy something self, looking into the mirror, feeling vulnerable, and out of that came this tune. I also remember getting applause for the song, which took me by surprise. That was a fun summer for me--I liked this camp better then Camp Merrimont, where I had been for the last two years. Of course, I had no choice but to attend the camp, my father was its dramatic counselor, and my mother the nature counselor. As a child, I longed for a full summer in the city, every day being able to sit in front of the television set and watch baseball, or attend some games at the Stadium or the Polo Grounds.  But it was not to be. Although I liked Towanda, my parents were unhappy there, and so they returned to Merrimont for the next two years, and I of course, reluctantly went with them.  Amazingly, it was not until the summer between my Sophmore and Junior year at Hopkins, that I actually spent a full summer in the city. (And that was a one with plenty of upheavals).
  Just one more thing about the summer of 53. Among the campers was an 11 year old girl named
Joan Lacey. She was beautiful for her age, and it was as if the whole camp fell in love with her.
She played Jiminy Cricket in my Pinnochio play, so I had some scenes with her, but my most vivid memory of her was at a talent show and the song she sang. It was from the movie Moulin Rouge.
It began; Whenever we kiss, I worry and wonder,
               Your lips may be there, but where is your heart?
That was enough to conquer us all, but it is the middle section that stays with me.
Its a bridge with four lines. I only remember the last one, but can't get it out
of my head;  Oh why must I--------------------
                     Pretending I am someone else.
As she sang it, she seemed to know exactly what it meant---but what does that line
  mean for me?
Why have I held on to those words, and that vision of the elusive but beautiful Joan, standing
on stage, singing it. I simply can't get that moment out of my head.
  Pretending I am someone else...? Let's end here.