today is the....

day of all days, the day that we single people dread, the day you have to be SOMEWHERE---New Year's Eve. Yet despite a little sadness in the early morning after waking, as I sit here in the library, I am feeling very invigorated. Just went through schedules of COIL, American Realness, and Under the Radar, trying to at least look at the schedules of what I want to see---trying to balance that out with the possible subbing and tutoring that I will have during that time. It is going to be intense! Also, your banana bag people are doing something at Bushwick---friend Sarah is involved with something happening at Abrons (after Realness festival) dealing with Mourning Becomes Elektra, and just got invited to another project at Dixon Place. Would also like to see what The Changeling is and also possibly (but not probably) King Charles III. (Don't bet on it!) So things are moving along, just have to get through this evening. Just found out that two very good friends will be bartending at South Fourth after 9, and then at some point will visit Bobby and the group at La Flaca. Lots of unknowns here, could be an interesting group of people at the bars, but then again, could not, and cityboy, you know you get bored very easily. Can't go to a coffee shop and read on New Year's Eve, can you (well, I guess you can, but will there even be one open?) Well, let's let the day speak for itself.
Last night, after sessions, returned home, went to Lincoln Center---would have liked to have seen a Sirk film, but arrived a little late for one and did not want to spend two hours waiting for the next, so I got a ticket to the Mizoguchi film, had only seen Sansho the Bailiff, a magnificent film, about 44 years ago (Richard Goode, my friend, recommended it to me and my then girl friend Susan and I saw it at the New Yorker).
This film far more staid and controlled---I found myself outside of it for most of the time, respected it but not very involved, it killed time, but not much else. Actually left about 15 minutes before the film ended.
Tired, went home and right to sleep.
Will finish at 2, not sure what happens between then and arrival in Williamsburg in the evening. May walk around possibly visit the Heights, a place I do not go to often. Something else may evolve. will report on this and tomorrow's party at the Singer's on Saturday.

Wednesday morning....

feeling very refreshed, not much to report since last post, after sessions yesterday, felt tired, stopped off at friendly internet place on 148th and Broadway, then hungry so went to Wallace's across the street, had my basic frank and a beer, no contact---returned home and essentially slept, just very tired.
 For today, hope to have some 'culture" in the evening---maybe one of the Sirk movies or even possibly Philharmonic if I can get in on Senior ticketing. Tomorrow is the big deal--New Year's Eve, the amazing elephant in my room. Can go to two bar parties---South fourth and the La Flaca, lots of people I know will be at the latter, but still, mostly it is a question of just getting through the night,waiting for the god damned bell to drop, a little celebration and hugs and then heading home.
Will, (can) tomorrow be different..? Well, one never knows.  
   Once January begins, world will be full of things to do and see. The three theater festivals---and don't even ask me what else. What about politics? People are picketing Gracie Mansion today, and many Wednesday's to come to protest his lack of compassion for those being threatened by gentrification. That part of it is not attractive. How far do I want to go..? Next BAN meeting is the second Thursday of January---will see then.
  Not much else to say, feeling pretty upbeat about my life---will continue...

pain seems to....

be subsiding, probably a result of my carrying that heavy bag back and forth to Boston. Feeling better now, though some stiffness in the back. Lots of events in the next two days.
Trip back from Boston arduous, but a little better than the trip going. Only took Amtrak to New Haven, really needed the break---had a decent pizza slice,  then trip back to NY via the Metro North train a little bit more viable. Took subway back to apartment, had no real problems, then went out and bought a banana shake, really needed it before going to sleep.
Very tired on trip back, probably result of my not sleeping very much Sunday morning. Slept well enough yesterday, not feeling particularly tired today.
So, was the trip necessary..? Well, yes in the fact that it enabled me to experience Natasha and Pierre again---certainly love the music and the energy of the whole piece, will give me something to discuss with theater friends (that is always important). Also, remarkable coincidence of meeting up with Bill and Nancy and later having coffee and sharing things with them was also important. Neither of those things would have happened if I had rejected the trip and spent the two days in NYC.
But a lot of restlessness. The hotel was far enough away from Harvard Square that on Sunday, once I got to Harvard I was stuck there for about two hours before entering the theater. Spent a lot of time wandering through the COOP, that brought back memories from the past (Bonnie, Susan) and was too restless to just read something to pass the time. Reaquainted myself with Harvard Square and the blocks surrounding it---stores very familiar to me have gone but atmosphere, filled with kids, remains. Spectators at ART always amaze me. The majority of them seem neither young or old, almost all in the middle aged zone, very different from NYC, where audiences seem either completely under 40 (downtown theater) or sixty or over. At ART it seems like there is just a tremendous supply of middle agers in the surrounding areas to come see their work.
  So trip seems to be a mixed bag, maybe I am simply so enmeshed in my NY city experience that traveling just doesn't work. Or maybe it is Boston. Want to go to DC possibly in the winter, and of course, there is Baltimore, always feel comfortable there.
That seems to be all for now, have the rest of the day to live through, report tomorrow on how it went.

moday, around 11--

preparing to leave Boston (Cambridge) simply waiting for the 3:20 train, so hotel that I stayed in (nice for the price) has internet, so here I am.
Some pain in the back and legs, a little slowness getting up, this is new, is it because I carried the heavy bag with me through the stations?  Have to carry same bag in the station on the way back  then to New Haven and then on the subway home. Doable without taxi's.
Better be---you know how determined I am not to use them in NY. Well, let's see what happens.
Trip to Boston has its ups and downs. Very restless on the Amtrak train. Believe it or not, bus might have been perferable. Something taught and focused about the bus ride. Train was not filled, a sense of coldness, alienation seemed to be present.No problem with the ride itself, very efficient. But a lot of time to let my mind wander.
Finally arrived, long walk from T station to hotel---almost disastrously lost my way, but was saved by meeting a couple who steered me on the right direction. Hotel itself is very nice, did a lot of television surfing before leaving for Harvard Square. Can't imagine having that many channels in my home, might go crazy, or apathetic---is it necessary, but so many people consider that normal.Eventually left for ART, very early, of course. Spent about two hours wandering around the square, lots of time at the co-op , broswed what seemed like one million books---finally went to the Loeb to see Natasha and Pierre. Looked around, so no people from NY whom I might have known, ambivalent about saying hello to the three actrors in Natasha whom I had met previously---none of them knew me well, however, this was not necessary. Out of nowhere arrived Bill Brown, my classmate from Hopkins and his wife Nancy. Spent the intermissions talking with them, then we all went out to Ihop in Harvard square to get a bit afterwards (actually I was the only one who ate, they just had decafs) then they drove me back to the hotel. A really nice couple, the conversation was very relaxed and friendly; their take on the musical was different from mine, since they don't go to the theater alot, were amazed by the interactive staging, which, of course was very "normal' to me. May see them in NY when they visit; they are both retired, seem to have as much money as they need, live a very (what seems to me) relaxed life going out, visiting friends,enjoying grand children,  seems to work for them.Glad that I ran into them.
   But its was really for the musical, Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812, that I made this visit. How was it...? Much more expansive then the production that I saw at its second performance at Ars Nova. A bit too much "pizazz' for my taste, but understand why they are doing it. Glad that part of Andre has been expanded. Still love the music, loved the marvelous esprit of the cast, they seemed to be having a great time. Ending of the piece is really beautiful, though, to be frank, I missed Dave Malloy himself in the piece as Pierre.Something about his presence at the piano, both playing Pierre and conducting the others, that made perfect sense to me. Will miss that in NY as well. But this is why I chose this visit, wanted very much to reaquaint myself with this piece, did not want to wait until production comes to NY (did not even know it would when I decided to go) so, despite some strangeness in my mood here (some memories of past visits coming back as well) I think this is what I was supposed to do.
Will return to NY this afternoon, lots of sessions scheduled for the next two days, hope I will be in good shape for those, will see how things develop...

so tomorrow....

I leave on my one day trip to Boston. Now it is becoming more real to me, must start to plan packing stages and such. Still not sure how I feel about it, probably need the trip more than I can imagine, for it should stimulate my imagination which is very important. Return early Monday evening, (it will be colder so remember to pack your sweater) and continue sessions Tuesday into the week. No real plans for the rest of the day, should be some preparation and maybe a movie. Think I need to be with people in the evening, so perhaps the Dive Bar on 96th and Amsterdam or something like it. Might end up in Brooklyn, but not sure.
Wednesday evening, saw 45 years, the movie with one of my idols from college, Tom Courtenay and Charlotte Rampling. Movie for someone my age is full of memory's of their early work juxtaposed with their current physical presence. A good solid movie, Courtenay's break down at the end, totally unexpected but brilliant---Ms. Rampling is brilliant all the way through. Some holes in the plot, but will talk about that some other time. Glad I saw it, afterwards, went to La Flaca, Bob was there, as was his former roommate Ed. I had had some good conversations about life with Ed before he left for Florida, so it was good to see him , also about eight years ago, he had told me about his twin girls, who had serious health issues after they were born, and the courageous and passionate doctors who helped Ed and his wife and the two girls through it. Now here were the girls, looking great, at La Flaca. Really nice to see. Also nice to see Jenny, who was working there that one day. May spend New Year's Eve at La Flaca, not sure about that at this point.
Yesterday, a bit of a downer, city is so strange on Xmas day. Passed AMC Lincoln Square at about one, amazing how many people were heading to that movie theater. They must do enough business on Christmas to justify their existence all year. Did not go there, and given the choice between a Douglas Sirk revival and the new Macbeth, chose the latter, an intense and sometimes bloody, but beautiful to look at response to the play. Lots of good insights in the movie, some changes but basically faithful to the material. Having a camera and a large cast means you can focus on some things a play director can't, in this case children, running around the castle and in the armies, adds a certain kind of depth to the vision of the play. Acting very good, Michael Fassbender really becomes a heartless animal in the second part of the movie. Left. somewhat exhausted, but glad that I saw it.
Evening, Dada Woof, Papa Hot, Peter Parnell's play at Newhouse. Lots of talk about aspects of the gay middle aged experience. Some of it extraneous, but the two scenes at the end were very moving. My friend Johnny P played a supporting role, always laugh when he is on stage. Great credit should go to actors Patrick Breen and John Hickey for navigating roles that move quickly from slick casual to fierce emotions. A necessary play...? Possibly, any way, saw it for free, gave me some things to think about.
As I said earlier, not sure about the rest of the day. May post from Boston, if I can find a computer, otherwise will tell all on Tuesday...

so here we...

are, back in Manhattan at the Lincoln Center library. Can't believe that less than two hours ago, I was around Grand Army Plaza at Flatbush. But how did I get there? More interesting story. Decided to visit Jimmy, great barista--all purpose adult at South Fourth, since I rarely get there during the day. Payed my visit, then thought the Brooklyn Library would stay open until 3--took the slow route from South Fourth to get there, that is, Broadway bus to Utica, the south on Utica to Eastern Parkway. Then 3 to Nostrand, when I got off and walked to the library, only to find out that it was closing in about 25 minutes, no time to use the computer. So I returned to the city, where the libraries (including this one) are opened until 3.
    Loved the bus ride, the 42 bus goes down Broadway until Utica begins, then south on Utica. Fascinating trip, looking at all the architecture and the changes that are happening along that route.
Then the walk from Nostrand to the library, west on Eastern Parkway. Somehow felt incredibly relaxed and happy to be there--all cares and rage seemed to disappear. Would have liked to stay in Brooklyn, but only place I could get my e-mail was here, so I returned to the upper west side. Corresponded with my facebook friend Tess, who had returned my message with a harsh defense of DeBlasio. A little unsettling the first time I read it, it is actually tamer than I thought, but I responded in what I think was a mannered and polite way, hopefully some good will come out of this.
Reading a great book, Tales of Two Cities, a compilation of mostly essays by writers about gentrification et. al. Great essay by a woman named Sarah Jaffe, about living in Crown Heights. Also a very moving essay by DB Gibson, gives a horrifying account of a family in Bushwick under siege by a vicious landlord. Feel privileged to be outside of all that, in the safe comfort of my West Side apartment. But what is to be done...?
What about the rest of the day? Return to Brooklyn, go down to IFC to see 45 years. |Sunday I leave for my short trip to Boston, almost seems like a fever dream, not sure why I did it, but must go. Probably need the break. Library closing soon, will report again on Saturday.

just replied...

to Facebook friend (and nice person) Tess, re her post that she "doesn't get" why people are so down on DeBlasio. I explained in a "private" message, that as the months of his term have gone on, he has constantly supported rapid gentrification and development in emerging gentrifying neighborhoods mostly in Brooklyn. Community groups in the Bronx are frightened by his "affordable housing vision"  Again, I think it is a question of how much a person allows themselves to know, how informed on all the issues they want to be.
She lives in Manhattan, so how much she understands about the Brooklyn problems, or even the Chinatown problems near where she lives, is not clear. Anyway, hopefully some interesting discussion (remember not to crow because you are more informed than most) will come out of this.
Last night, did go to the Met, saw La Donna del Lago and basically enjoyed it.  Cast took what could be silly emotions and really played them for passion, very impressive commitment by the five leads. Singing was really wonderful. The opera contains some beautiful music, all of it of course in the same style, which can be tiring to the ears. Yet there are moments when one really hears stunning originality from Rossini, and other moments that really look forward to Verdi's Trovatore or even Aida. Did not meet any one that I knew, which was a bit of a downer, also too tired to hang out or check out a bar afterwards. Nevertheless I enjoyed myself, felt that the choice was meaningful---something very nice about being at the Met.
Today, some sessions in the afternoon, then would like to check out the Brooklyn Public Library, the one at Grand Army Plaza this evening, pick up a few plays that have just been published that they have in the shelves that nyc libraries don't. Not sure where I will end up..tomorrow, Christmas Eve, may be totally open, would like to catch up on a few movies, but it should be a beautiful day, nice time to be out..we will see