Saturday afternoon at...

Lincoln Center Library, sitting at the computer. Had to practically fight my way in---children and their parents everywhere, all over the center, almost no thought about how adults just wanting to use the library can navigate the space, This year Halloween seems to be completely hyped up in the city---really appalling--as if the city could simply forget its problems for a day because it is Halloween. A long way from the sixties and seventies, when the day was seen as kind of meaningless fun for a small portion of the community.
A little calmer now, but really frustrated by all the child traffic at the center, on the subway, etc. lining the upper west side.
So Wednesday was a restless day, and once tutoring was over, returned to the apartment tired and feeling some stomach cramps. Went to sleep very early, only to find a message around 10 from the music teacher at Friends, asking me to take her classes the next day. Had to think about it for a moment, then accepted. Figured that even if my body was cramped and tired, I could make it through, even if it meant three classes of second and first grade students. Immediately fell asleep---woke up around 3 in the morning, all of a sudden no pain, no fatigue, felt as if I was shot out of the cannon, could have gone to Friends then. Amazed at the contradictions between the two mornings, Wednesday, no work, fatigued, Thursday, work ahead, body strong and head excited at the challenge ahead. Turned out I actually worked in the library as well that day---so that and the next day at Friends turned into a long and productive haul.
Today, body really does need rest, when time in library is over, will probably return to apartment and take it easy for a while---will see A View From the Bridge tonight--really looking forward to it--not sure where I will go after that, probably somewhere to watch the rest of the world series game.
Tomorrow, I think I will see A Face in the Crowd at BAM. Fascinating movie, love Andy Griffith in this kind of role (using his naive charm to be controlling) saw it first right before my 10th grade year at Science (oh, how I wanted a girl friend that year!) and then during a summer when I was in college it was broadcasted on TV. Now I feel really drawn to it, there are three showings at BAM tomorrow, probably will go to first or middle on. Anyway that is the plan now, open, of course to change.
     Just ordered tickets to Perfect Arrangement, the play playing at the Duke, closing next week, I wanted to go on Tuesday, but had to pick Thursday because TDF did not have Tuesday on its list. Want to see Jennifer, an actress who I have known for about 20 (maybe longer years) never see her "in the world" but always have a nice discussion with her when I see her work. So I am checking this out.
That is all for now--hope I can negotiate the Center a little more easily when I leave then when I came in.

here we are....

Wednesday morning, just received instructions from Josh whom I will be subbing for on Friday, have to read The Custom House. part of The Scarlet Letter by Hawthorne, good, for that is the only reason that I would read it. Want to be prepared to run a good class.
Yesterday, library quite the opposite of Monday, very hectic, spent a lot of time "shushing" students, a much more frenetic day there. Left feeling very tired, proceeded to BAN meeting, only to find out it had been canceled, not a problem for I was very tired, needed to get home. Some part of me considered that if I knew the meeting was off, I could have gotten a ticket for Tanheuser at the Met, which began at 7---however, in view of the fact that I was exhausted, probably would not have been a good idea, really sorry that I will miss it this year. A few minutes out of the BAN space, realized that I was not carrying my library book Saint Mazzie that I had brought to Friends. Panicked, did I leave it at BAN? Did not think so, probably left the library without it---still, very disconcerting, I never lose anything---on the 1 train back to home, felt very annoyed and angry.
Thought of going to a bar to watch game one of World Series, but was too tired, just returned to the apartment, and actually fell asleep for most of the game. A quick smoothie run at around 12:30 was the only voyage I took last night.
Then a depressing dream, do not remember much of it except that traveling home, I had to go through Charles and 34th in Baltimore, the street that faces the Hopkins Campus. Returned to apartment (this is still the dream) realized that I had forgot my keys, panicked, the  awoke feeling weird.
What does it mean...? Well, the Hopkins part probably is a statement of how much those four years there impacted me, and how the memories and acts of those years still "haunt" me. Have to deal with the fact that some of those I interacted with profoundly at that time are now dead, or probably have forgotten much of the content of our encounters--unlike myself, who remembers much in detail. Henry Roth, the novelist, was able to reconstruct his whole childhood and teen-age years while in his eighties. Amazing!
Today, a few lessons, then a possible trip to BAN to help make some flyers for an action tomorrow, which I do not want to participate in.  Still, need to make a contribution.
Otherwise, not sure how much time I can give to my "art" projects, that is seeing the plays that my friends are doing, during this very hectic time. Glad I have tickets to A View From the Bridge on Saturday evening--other plays like Barbecue at the Public and Perfect Arrangement that an actress friend of  mine is in might have to be skipped. And what about my planned return visit to Cindy and Jeff's project at the Bushwick Starr---can I do it?
Stay tuned, as the next two weeks play themselves out.

some problems....

at Friends, will not go into it now, better to discuss it with someone I feel is appropriate there---great day there yesterday, however, on the go from 8 to 6---much too tired to go to Bushwick for my friend John's reading yesterday evening, which is what I expected. Had 4.5 periods, two movies for French, and the chem classes with the 10th grade and 11th-12th grade. Good to see everyone, then 3 hours in the library, had some good conversations with some of the students, one particularly rewarding one with Annie L, had not seen her since last summer--really good to touch base with her finally and share some info. She, like so many of the other seniors, is dealing with this crucial time while she figures out what to do about college entrance. Remember that time in my own life, lots of pressure from parents and peer envy. Wish I could be more supportive and dialogue with the students, but  they seem to know what is happening, and accept my (somewhat superficial) support. Going back to run the library again this afternoon, really looking forward to it---then will be back for a full day again on Friday, including a more abbreviated library session.
Weekend: on the way to meet Robin at her hotel restaurant, quite by accident ran into Pete, former bartender at All State, amazingly enough he told me there was a reunion at Malachi's of much of the former All State crew. Had a nice dinner with Robin, then off to the bar---really glad Pete told me about the reunion, had a really good time there, touching base with many whom I knew well during my 15 or so years there as a "regular". Nice conversations with Kerry and former bartender Gabrielle, as well as my Facebook friend Tess. Felt really upbeat returning to the apartment.
Sunday: a tale of many neighborhoods, went to Cobra to watch football game, stayed for first half, interest was not held as much as I expected---then to where...? All Brooklyn before me! Decided to take the bus on Dekalb and Wycoff, it goes through the seven streets of Bushwick, then through bed-stuy, Clinton Hill and Fort Greene, with all the gentrification going on it is still a fascinating trip though the streets of Brooklyn. Got off around DeKalb and Cumberland, surrounded by the beautiful (and now very expensive) brownstones of Fort Greene, a little off put by all of it, had a pizza slice on Fulton, then walked into Park Slope, stopped at Coffee, a great place for a pick up on Bergen near 5th. After that walked a bit more, but decided it was time to return to the Manhattan.
Saw the movie "Nasty Baby" at IFC, a movie about gentrification (at least that is one of the issues the movie brings up). Not a great movie, but very skillful, some beautiful camera shots that define the house that the two men live on (ironically enough on Adelphi Street in Fort Greene, where I just had been). Ending very violent, not sure I buy into it, but glad that I saw the movie.
Returned home early after that, decided just to rest, so that my energy would be high for the day coming (Monday, it was)
Today, after library, looks like another BAN meeting, will see how I fit in to the current plans for the next day of demonstration....

all dressed up....

with nowhere to go...seems to be the situation at this moment; still somewhat tired from my work this week---yesterday, one session, over at around 7, not much energy to give after that, slept for a while, then up---very unpleasant two guys at store where I buy my food, around 11:00, problem did not escalate, fortunately, still a bit shaken by it.
Afternoon is free, meeting my friend Robin for a meal at her hotel this evening around 7. She will have seen two plays, will give me a report---wonder how she will like Fun Home, one of them.
Until then, not physically prepared to sit through a play, would like to lose myself in a movie, maybe Nasty Baby at IFC, though probably should check out the more relevant Taxi, which is there and also at Lincoln Plaza. Two movies at my favorite movie theater, the Bunin-Walter Reade in Lincoln Center not showing anything that I am dying to see.Stomach still recovering from a full blown ache yesterday, that might add to my wanting to be at a movie, where I can leave or use the bathroom when I have to, rather than a play, where I am physically locked in until intermission or end. It is also a beautiful fall day, if I wern't a little fatigued, might consider exploring a section in Brooklyn (might still do that anyway) but probably will remain in Manhattan.
Tomorrow is open, should rest because Monday, I both sub at Friends and supervise the library at Friends from 3 to 6, After that there is the reading that I am invited to in Bushwick (think I mentioned that yesterday) but will only go if I have the energy for it. For tomorrow, plan is to find a low key bar or coffee place to watch the Jet-Patriot game, and then maybe see my friend Ellie's project near Pier 12 on the far west side.
That is all for now....will reveal how the weekend turned out at some point soon...

In two days....

my life changed...on Tuesday received phone calls offering me two jobs at Friends for the next two days. Both were subbing for tenth graders; I saw that group three times this week, really getting to know them, an excellent adventure. Many of them I know from my marathon two weeks replacing Lianna as an English teacher in 2012, back when they were sixth graders.So, when i left Friends yesterday, it was with great relief, yes, the three days out of four there left me tired, but my budget is much closer to being balanced then it was before the week began.
New pay period began today, next week have booked three library days, and for now, two sub assignments. For the week after, which ends the pay period, I have already booked one. So things are looking up, that plus the tutoring should make me pretty comfortable in the weeks to come.
Not a lot much more to discuss, on Monday, John, a playwright friend of mine, from the Bushwick Starr is having a reading of a new play of his, would love to go, but with the work during the day, and the library committment until 6, wonder if I will have the strength to travel to Bushwick after all that.
On Monday night, tired from the subbing and three hour library assignment, I nevertheless pushed myself to Joe's Pub for the Half Straddle benefit. Had good time, the presentations were dynamic, but also (as is often the case at benefits) a little bit self congradulatory----the combination of the day work and the night "partying" (if that is what you wish to call it) left me pretty fatigued the next day. That is what is on my mind when I think about Monday, really hope I can do it, for John is a really nice guy, and I would like to be supportive of his work. Plus always enjoy being part of the Bushwick Starr 'community".  But rest is important to, let's see how the weekend plays out.
Rest of day fairly open, may have two sessions, not sure about plans for tonight---should do something and also check in on the Roya- BlueJay game 6. Hope the Royals win it, think that that would be a much more interesting match up against the Mets.
Still would love to see Rocco and His Brothers, this time around at Film Forum, but wonder if that is possible. This afternoon will probably head to Lincoln Center library to do some browsing, maybe read a bit of Tanner on Shakespeare before heading to Harlem.
Will report back later...

Summation:

Saturday, Clare canceled meeting, giving me a little more time to relax before heading out to Bushwick for Cynthia's performance, still got there early (of course) and had to wander around in the cold before getting to the Starr. Cindy's piece was interesting, not as fully realized as her Saint Ann's pieces were, also almost a play with the way her husband Jeff is included. Some moments about taking care of one's partner that I found very moving, made me want to "take care" of somone; think I will try to see it again, particularly if it is extended for a week, still will I have the time..? So many things happening, one simply replaces the other.
Afterwards, went to Heavy Woods, got a sprite and watched baseball on their enormous but very effective screen. Like the place, waited for some others who had seen the play to show, but they didn't. Nevertheless, the vibe was fun, might want to watch other stuff there at some point.
Sunday, a day of travel, visited Liz Y at her studio at the Navy Yard, stayed a while, still marvel at her ability to put colors and jagged edges together, left and began my long trek down Flushing Avenue, finally stopped at Flushing and (I think) Washington, a new coffee place there, looked inviting but since I was going to Bushwick to have coffee anyway, could not stop in. Bus took forever to come, then an interesting ride up Flushing Avenue (the very northern edge of Bed-Stuy, very hasidic) and off at Wycoff to watch football and have coffee at Cobra.
Remained there for about an hour, read a few Times pieces then decided to move on, probably to South fourth. Got the DeKalb bus, took it to Broadway, would have liked to walk a bit more, but it was cold, and I was underdressed, so got on J to Marcy Ave stop. Remained at South fourth for about three hours, the usual good cheer, watched the Mets on their way to their second win, had a nice conversation with Lisa, who lives in Sheepshead Bay and has four dogs. (She had one of them with her, a very friendly one.) Had to leave around 9, although Lisa would have enjoyed continuing the conversation---could have remained there with her and a few others, but left...why...? That was it for Sunday.
Monday, got a surprise phone call from Kate, asking me to replace Chris for the day at Friends. First actual teaching sub in a while, will have two next  week, so did that, enjoyed it, worked with two 10th grade groups on  groups on Beyawolf; then to the library for my scheduled three hour turn.
There, had some discipline problems, thing I handled them well, maybe some follow up. returned home absolutely exhausted, but decided to go to Half Straddle benefit at Joe's Pub---did so, not much contact, will discuss more at another time (maybe).
Time to return to the real world, Some lessons today and a BAN meeting, will see how it all turns out.

exhausted....

after yesterday's"  marathon". Worked in library until 4:30, then up to Robert B's for a lesson, then home, totally exhausted, asleep by 8, woke up about 12, feeling dehydrated, had to go out to get some grapefruit juice, then read a little, then back to sleep, woke up around six, body very tired. I guess it comes from a lot of the shelving that I did in the library the first hour of work. Also could not find one laptop to return to cabinet, wonder if it was already taken out by tech staff, or if I completely missed it. I must have scoured every inch of the library trying to find it before I left but to no avail.
Frustrating.
Today, had a session that ended a little after 11, now at Lincoln Center, tempted to see something this afternoon to kill time and relax, and take my mind off things, but decided not to.Very booked up for the next few days, now that i am working in the library on Monday. But I have to do it.
Today, will try to take it easy until about 5, then will leave for Buswick, conversation with Claire,  and the Cynthia's play. Will probably hang out afterwards as well (usually do) also hopefully watch some of the Met game.Tomorrow will visit Liz Y at her art studio near the Navy Yard, and then the other interview in Bushwick. Monday and Tuesday, I won't even write, already set.
Need a cup of coffee, but have already drank two today---maybe my body just needs to rest.
Will keep you posted....