so tomorrow....

I will be subbing at Friends, what looked like a simple half day has turned into a full day that is almost non-stop from 9:40 to 3:10---actually there is an hour break from around 12 to 1, but I am very willing to submit to this heavy schedule. Will have to tell one of my students that I can only see her at four, instead of at 1, but she has to understand that that is the way it is. Or possibly I can move her to another day. Anyway, really looking forward to it...should be fun. Think I have the eighth grade twice.
Yesterday, a day without tutoring, some problems with structure, but ultimately things turned out okay. Decided to see the movie that Richard Gere made called Time Out of Mind, in which he plays a homeless man about his age. Very straightforward movie---some very harsh moments, not a lot of variety, so it was easy to get caught in its sadness, but still a strong picture of how a homeless man functions. Also great supporting performances from Ben Vereen and Kyra Sedgwick (almost unrecognizable, but then again, I have not seen her television work).There are moments when the camera focuses on Gere in such a way that he appears extremely handsome, so at those moments, some of the illusion of homelessness is muted, also, there is comfort for the viewer in knowing that Gere is not truly homeless, far from it (I assume) which allowed me to focus more on the fact that this was just a "role" for him, and not his life. Yet the soberness of the movie and its straightforward depiction of this very depressing world, really comes though, when I awoke this morning, I was experiencing the sadness and hopelessness of the movie (sometimes the choices I make for the night before, and the feelings that these choices evoke, carry over to my first thoughts in the morning). That was, of course, before I got the call requesting my services at Friends, which moved me into a different zone.
Plans for the weekend are firming up, Friday there is an interesting film at the Bushwick (still another) film festival. From the advance blurb, it is about a man looking for a former lover, who, finding out that she has died, tracks down her younger sister and begins a relationship with her--sounds like the kind of movie that I like, though who knows it could be kind of turgid. If I go, the movie shows in a space on Flushing Avenue, so I will be in Bushwick---possible to drop into Pine Box, or one of the other watering holes there, Saturday and Sunday there is also the work of friends of mine that I should visit.
So let's get started with the day...

so the rest of the...

weekend went something like this: Saturday, rested until 6, then decided to go and see the Verdi program at the Moth, which meant traveling to the Wilson Avenue station in Bushwick (actually where Bushwick ends) No problem, got there, liked the energy, unfortunately found the program rather boring---really thought that a new company would choose the un-typical Verdi, here the choices were from the repertory that everyone knows. Not really staged with any vision. Singers had voices that could handle the music, but not a lot of individuality---found myself getting very annoyed. Audience loved it though (though what that means I have no idea) Afterwards, I was very clear to Clint about not liking the evening. Must have come on very strong, and since I think he feels a strong bond to the company he got very aggressive. I was then forced to defend myself, probably could have defused the whole thing by just saying it wasn't for me, but a big argument followed. Left feeling kind of shook up, those things really don't happen to me much, but felt a need to defend my position, and was surprised that Clint bought into the whole thing. But like I said, he probably has a strong bond to the company, maybe feels a stake in their future, so that might have been what provoked his strong outburst,
But the night wasn't over---I had previously been invited to a party by the BAN people, it was on 24th and 7th, and though I was tired, figured I would stop by and see who was there. Got there around 11, after walking up sixth from 14th street. Really hungry, bought a six pack of beer for the party, lots of chicken, which I gorged on. But very few people were there who I knew, so left soon after filling myself up.Will be there for the next meeting on Thursday. Returned home to find a text from Clint, thanking me for coming out---I think that makes things a bit better between us--should be no problem in the future.
Sunday, main event was finishing Between the World and Me, very stirring memoir by Te-Nihani Coates, Got some great ideas for the discussion at Friends that I expect to attend in two weeks. Rest of day included a stop off at South Fourth for Pizza that never arrived, had to go over to new place on North Fifth--pretty good (but not great) pizza. That was followed by a trip out to Cobra, got a chance to relax, watch the football game and read the Times, nice bartender. After that not sure of plans: did I want to go back to Manhattan and see a movie, but I was in Bushwick and urge to explore took over. Finally settled on taking the bus that goes from DeKalb and Irving to downtown Brooklyn, moving through Bushwick Bed-Stuy Clinton Hill and Fort Greene. Fascinating trip---especially the blocks between Malcolm X and Bedford--lots of new buildings emerging on those blocks, (Coates would consider that a bad thing), but watching the change in architecture very fascinating. Would love to travel every east west block on Bed Stuy like that, look at all the architecture
Anyway, after that got tired, went to Bark, on the Park Slope border for one of their excellent hamburgers (really the only place that I get hamburgers from) and then, really exhausted, returned home by the three train.
Rest of today, not sure, would love to see something at film festival, but don't know if I can handle expense---still should see Time Out of Mind---the movie about the homeless person played by Richard Gere. Probably will go to Lincoln Center library this afternoon, maybe read Oedipus at Collonus, the one play of the Oedipus trilogy that I know the least. Will keep you posted....

so here I am in...

library on 145th street, having just finished my only lesson for the day. Sadly, the two girls just skipped on me while I took a bathroom break---I did not expect that even though the session was realistically over. Sometimes I feel they can be very manipulated. Will have to work it through, however.
Yesterday, good day at Friends, rambunctious ninth graders---but got through it some interesting new faces who have just joined the friends community. Afterwards, was tired, but decided to go to movie theater at Lincoln Center to see if I could see Kazan's Wild River, it was being shown for free as a prelude to whole film festival, along with several other films. Had not trouble getting in--really liked the movie, always love watching Montgomery Clift---others from my youth in the movie include Lee Remick, Robert Earl Jones, Jo Van Fleet (she is superb in the role of the intransigent grandmother who won't sell her land to the TVA) and Albert Salmi as the town bully. Still not tired, went to Irish bar on 72nd street, met friend Gary, who was born and raised in Baltimore and we watched some of the Baltimore, Boston game on TV. Lots of people in the bar who had seen the Pope in Central Park, or who at least got near him. Gary is a lawyer about my age who works for the city, about to retire. We have the shared vision of some kind of life in Baltimore in common. He seems more troubled by the fact that the Freddy Gray trial will be held in the city, then I do.We discussed some of the inns and outs of the trial and things in Baltimore in general.
Today, thought I would just "drift" and let things happen, but just found out about an opera program in deep Bushwick that seems very interesting. Friends of mine will be there, really thinking about going. That leaves the afternoon, have one book to read, but don't find it very interesting. Not sure how this will play out. That's all for now...

so it's Thursday...

one lesson down, one to go. Here I am at Lincoln Center  Library, one of my favorite places, with some time on my hands. What's new since yesterday? Well...
Will sub tomorrow at Friends, really looking forward to that.
Yesterday, no fatigue in the afternoon, after the two lessons, returned home and prepared for evening trip to FUREE meeting---at NYCHA projects in York Street in Vinegar Hill. Luxury condos directly across the street from the projects---amazing! Jay Street seems to be a dividing line. On one side, affluent DUMBO, and on the other, the Navy Yard projects. Do they get along with mutual respect..?  Can't say. FUREE meeting was productive, not that many people there, Michael and Shatia trying to rev up the NYCHA residents as it seems like their place is being threatened. There is a meeting on October 5th, should go and show my support, even if I don't live in the projects. Will see how it plays out. Enjoy my friendship with Michael H, the Hopkins graduate (11) who is playing a major role in FUREE life.
After that headed for Jack, the performance space for a reading of a play by my friend Merlin's friend, Sinaz. This is a piece that I have seen in progress before---she still is playing with the vision for the second act. Lots of people there, to my surprise, everyone very friendly. Shocked to see my old friend Margo S, who is about my age, and does not leave Manhattan much, as far as I know, at the Reading. Spoke to her afterwards, she met another woman there, and they were going home together, so I did not have to accompany them, instead I could take my long wandering walk through Brooklyn (or actually towards BAM and the close subways) , which, sad to say, really turned out to be uneventful. Got pizza at a place near BAM, it was good, but decided I did not want to try a bar for a beer, just went home. Saw many people I knew at the Reading---that was fun---Sinaz is finally going to do a complete production at the Brick in the spring---Good! Hope she gets it out of her system (yes, there are many good things there) and goes on to her next original project.
Weekend fairly open, might take a vacation from seeing plays---party for BAN members on Saturday evening at 24th street space, should go, should be good for an hour, or thereabouts. On Saturday day, thinking of going out to Ditmas Park, have not been there for a while, might be good to wander around there.
Should be reporting back on Saturday(usually do not blog when I work at Friends) so we will see how things turn out.

apotheosis.....

went to Sybil's play last night---Fondly, Colette Richland---and was blown away. Great experience, made more powerful by the fact that I knew the work of most of the actors. An amazing bond created between the ERS actors and Sibyl's writing. Was not sure if I would go with the crazy quilt experience that happens midway into Act I, but found myself enjoying it, understanding the language that Sybil was using, and was feeling very upbeat and goodnatured about it when I spoke to Sybil after Act I. Act II continued in that vein, but it built, and became more bizarre, I found myself grooving with the characters more and more and then that amazing dance piece about 10 minutes before the end, just blew me away---everything in the play was leading up to that---made the whole experience so exciting.
Afterwards, congratulated Sybil, she invited me to have a beer with several members of the cast and a friend of hers---Great discussion afterwards with Laurena, Suzi and Sybil. Felt very creative. Sybil seemed to need a boost of confidence--and I hope our discussion gave it to her; her work--language wise and thought wise, is really terrific. Not a play for everyone, but those who understand what is going on, the continuing vision from Sound and the Fury for the company, the amazing costumes whose colors add so much to the play, will hopefully be, like I was, truly astounded.
  What do I mean by 'apotheosis"? Just, as I was thinking this morning, a sense that the vision of myself as a creative person, that began really in my senior year of college, was fulfilled in the conversation that followed the play. Really glad that I could communicate my vision of what was on the stage, and that the actors were so happy to receive it.
Anyway, back to the "harsh realities" of the present---after this two lessons and then probably will go to FUREE meeting tonight at the projects at 6, After that, maybe will leave in time to go to Merlin's reading at JACK, maybe go back and visit my bartender friend Erin...maybe..well, we will see

so last night....

made the decision to go to Standing and watch the baseball games (Yankees and Mets, both in important games) and the football game as well. Free wings at 8:30---stuffed myself (no surprise there)  but did I make the right choice to reject the Readings at Franklin Park in favor of Standings. Standings is a good place; many people know me and like me there, bartenders friendly and courteous, but again, it is very male oriented (is there a sports bar that isn't?) and only works on certain of my needs. Would I have had a better time at Franklin Park, where I knew one of my facebook friends (also a Friends graduate) would be? Did I not want to risk being there by myself, in a sea of younger faces and relationships? Usually I have no problem being "older" when I go to plays or events that mostly include younger people, but these are people I know. If I had been strongly familiar with one of the writers, I might have felt less ambivalent about going.But now, the morning after, I do feel a little disappointed that I did not take the risk. Well, maybe there is a lesson learned here---have to consider this the next time I am faced with" major" choices.
That leaves the rest of the day---no real plans, no tutoring, will probably try to get a rush ticket to Sibyl's play this evening. Which leaves me with what? Not sure, might travel to Brooklyn, tonight is the eve of Yom Kippur, the most serious of the Jewish Holidays (which, as you can see, I don't observe) so streets should be empty. Just remembered that someone I met at Cobra Club runs a trivia contest on Tuesdays; if Sibyl's play does not work out, could end up there.
The strongest memory of Yom Kippur that I have concerns two Saturdays in September of 1960, and 1963. These were my freshman and senior years in Baltimore. The first, was actually about 10 days after I arrived at Hopkins for the first time, and only three days after classes began. My friend Jeff and I, found ourselves on Park Heights Avenue, the main street of one of the strongest Jewish neighborhoods in Baltimore. It was towards the end of the services, we walked form synagogue to synagogue (there were many of them on that length of street, about a mile) seeing if we could experience the last service. All of Jewish Baltimore, mostly families, was there in their finery---I watched as many kids my age, male and female, congregated around the Shuls. Felt very much like I wanted to be part of this, everything seemed so serene and well programmed. Finally, Jeff and I found a synagogue that had room for us for the final service---the rabbi spoke about Kennedy, then running for President, and some support for him that made the rabbi angry. This was my first glimpse into the Jewish section of Baltimore, in the next few years, I made many friends, double dated a lot in the area, had crushes on High School girls, all who may have been out that Saturday as I observed, wild eyed, the families before me.
Three years later, much more relaxed about Hopkins and myself,  I went back to Park Heights avenue, and this time did not go into a synagogue, just watched the procession, remembering my callowness from three years earlier. I guess at 20, I was amazed that the same procession was taking place as the one when I was 17.
Did I really want a girl friend from that area...? Never happened.
Left Hopkins the next year, returned only sporadically until the mid seventies. Not long after, Park Heights Avenue underwent a radical change, as the Jews moved out and north, their children went far and wide, and the black community replaced them. The splendor of those early sixties days was gone forever, storefronts boarded up and unsafe conditions replaced them. Similar to what happened in the Bronx, Brooklyn and probably other cities at that time.
Nevertheless, the memories still seem to me incredibly strong.
Will figure out what to do with the rest of the day.

so the weekend....

continued---Saturday, somewhat tired after the two sessions, returned home, but determined to see a movie---went to Bunin theater at Lincoln Center, where I saw  Creative Domain, the movie devoted to Paul Taylor choreographing Three Dubious Memories. Took the process from first rehearsal to premiere in Texas---nice interviews with the dancers---very intense look at creative process, enjoyed it and the talking heads featured in the movie. Afterwards there was a discussion with two former Taylor dancers---so not much was said about the dance choreographed in the movie. Wished there would have been some of the current dancers there---anyway, most of the discussion centered around the couple's (they are married) experiences as Taylor dancers---all in the past. I asked the one question that had to do with the ballet itself---found answers rather superficial---but that's the way it was. It was early after the film, but I was too tired tor really do anything more than have some yogurt
and fruit and go home.
Sunday, spent most of the day at the Brooklyn Book Fair, went to three discussions---hung around. Interestingly, I did not talk to anyone, but loved the atmosphere and the energy. First discussion revolved around writers and how they spent their time---Joyce Carol Oates was particularly articulate in that discussion, second was the one about gentrification, my main reason for being there. Would have liked to make a comment, but moderator, whom I felt asked too many trivial questions, kept the panel talking too long. Some good points, but reminded me just how many aspects there are to gentrification---one really needs a two hour discussion and an organized sense of topics to get at everything that is involved. Felt that I really had something to offer, but could not get it in. Should maybe start my own discussion at some point. Third panel focused on Sophocles' Antigone---a little intellectual at first, but got at some important point as the discussion built. Left at 6, feeling pleased that I had spent the day at the Fair. Very hungry, took 62 bus to South Fourth (best way to get there without leaving Brooklyn)---interesting trip first through Farragut Projects, then the northern border of Fort Greene-Clinton Hill, then Jewish Williamsburg---those projects and finally Bedford Ave. Got off at Berry and South 11th, took my first walk down Berry to South Fourth, did not realize that there were small projects on that corridor. Did assume that most of Williamsburg south of Broadway is Orthodox, however some strong patches of black and latino people there too.
A little time at South fourth, not much conversation, read interesting article in RealEstate section of  Times, about possible gentrification in South Bronx, did not realize how many buildings there were being redone. Returned home and slept.
Today, no work---not sure of afternoon, may go to Franklin Park reading tonight, or may watch baseball, will determine that later.