what to do.....

Why is sending a resume to another school so difficult for me? Well, it is, much as I argue with myself. seem caught in this emotional bottleneck. Surely it won't hurt to let another school know of your availability, especially if they say on their web site that they are looking for subs. On the other hand, early, not much is happening at Friends, still surprised that I was not asked to sub for the Field Day trip. Has happened often before (though not in 2011, which turned out to be a good year for me). So where do we go from here..?
Other news: Read much of Lynne Shraron Schwartz' memoir last evening. Again really am fascinated by memories of growing up Jewish in the forties and fifties, struck by the uniformity of vision, whether Brooklyn or Bronx, a very settled and consistent place, that is what we were given.
Afterwards, not sure of how I wanted to spend the evening, thought of going to South Fourth, but when I arrived in Williamsburg stopped off at Sweetwater---Shayla was there, talked for a long while with her and her friend Helen, who has worked with Joe Swanberg. Reminded (or awakened) her about voting today,  Wandered over to south fourth around 10, but not much was happening there, felt a real surge of energy, did not really wish to return home, instead took a longer route back to North Seventh. Tiredness kicked in, still glad I decided to go to the "Burg".
This morning, got up and voted early, then here...now fifteen minute extension. This afternoon will possibly call Billy, see if he wants to meet, then in the evening, again with the myriad of choices.
Was granted an extra fifteen minutes in the computer---so time is not at a premium....

seems like....

a long way from Saturday night, but did return to the Starr for the finale of the Dickinson project. Got there while the place is in a preparation, not party mode, and staff was more than happy to have me read a poem and a letter written by Dickinson. very successful all around, people who were there really liked it, Flako, who will have a project of his done at the Starr on  a weekend in December, asked me to read a poem for it, will probably do it. Rest of evening a mix of partying and a few poems to music, much like Friday,continued some fun conversations with denizens of the place, by about 9:40, however felt that I was through, left, spent a little time downstairs, and got some pizza at Two Boots by the Bedford stop on L. Ultimately very glad I went, meaningful to become part of that community, very accepted, made some new friends who I will continue with (disappointed that Julia, who I liked very much after our encounters on Thursday and Friday, was not there that night, but more of that some other time). Continue my commitment to "downtown theater community" (a really absurd name, if you consider it) and looking forward to October, when much happens.
Yesterday, simple day, went to south fourth for Pizza, then Cobra later to hang with Susan, Rob and friends.
Football not that interesting to me this year, could that be because of the publicity re violence and head concussions that has dominated the news in the past year, also because I am so put off by the "hermetically sealed" world of the sports shows that I listen to on the radio.
Today, feeling rested, will probably do some traveling, ambivalent about trivia this evening, maybe just "hang' at one the bars I frequent (will any of them show baseball...?) this afternoon, will return to Lincoln Center library to look at more of Tanner's prefaces to Shakespeare...

neglected Bronx...

doc, simply could not make the trip to the Bronx, then back to Bushwick. Sorry that I had to do this, I really admire what Mike is doing at Bronx Documentary Project, but the first commitment seems to be to the Starr.
So yesterday, slept a little, felt stronger, went out to Bushwick around 7:15, arrived just before show started.
More of the same, theater in a "celebration" mode, much dancing, seemed to dominate the proceedings last night, did not get to read the Dickinson poem that I chose, (maybe this evening, though I doubt it), but did more socializing, a good conversation with Julia (continued, totally by accident on the L train back to the city) about life and commitments, more conversations with Rebecca and a young actress named Lauren, and, Maria, the Bushwick Starr's producer. Lots of energy, a partying vibe all the way, where was Emily?  The "guts' of Dickinson?  Not really there. Still, feel that I must return to the place tonight (and probably a little exploration this afternoon as well) and let the ritual continue. Tomorrow will (if I am not too tired) probably begin my day at South Fourth, with the football and pizza, and take it from there.
Later today there is a rally to save Libraries at 42nd and 5th Avenue, may go there and give support.
Rest of day unsure..will be continued...

so they were shouting

EMILY DICKINSON! EMILY DICKINSON! And the event began at Bushwick Starr, at first I thought I was just witnessing a young persons (early twenties) superficial rite of passage, but after the frenetic dancing a few songs with lyrics from Dickinson's poetry, kind of arresting, things changed for me when Rebecca, a dancer in the piece, started talking to me, and invited me to read a Dickinson poem, sort of an Emily Dickinson karaoke. I did, and immediately felt more like part of the festivities. Left fairly early, was tired, planned to return this morning, but did not make it. Saw Noagh today for tutoring, good work, then off to the Starr again. This time I found out they were simply rehearsing a piece for tonight, some guests were there, other dancers had gone home, should be back this evening.
Now, half past three, had planned to go to open house party at Bronx Documentary center, now not sure, need to rest a bit, feeling tired, can return to Bushwick at any time, already much traveling on the subway, do I want to visit the Bronx and then go back to Brooklyn? Long night, will play it by ear.
Not much else to day, found a good Dickinson peom (130) that I will read this evening, probably a lot of loud sound tonight, will try to stay longer, then tomorrow night, the final evening and party, should go to Bronx Doc for tribute to slain photographer and a small benefit for him, but probably won't, will choose the Starr and the final celebration of the  Emily Dickinson performance piece.

so I got.....

very tired, after my stay at Columbia Library, and headed home, slept for about two hours. Woke up, still tired, took a walk, had to plan my evening. Felt like visiting Erin at Burp Castle, but very tired, but what was the alternative. So went anyway, in a tired state. Good idea that I did, had a long talk with her about the project, found out the date (10/4) and shared some ideas with her. Seems that she lives right near Mayday space in Bushwick and was not aware of it (I wish activist groups would share information in an easier way).
Said that she will drop in and investigate. Had a good time, after that just grabbed a slice of pizza and headed home, pretty tired.
Yet despite that, awoke around three A.M, full of energy, actually toyed with the idea of going out, but didn't.
This is beginning to be habit, these middle of the night awakenings. Will it happen again tonight...?
Well, can stay at the Bushwick Starr for my performance as late as I wish, strange happening, this Emily Dickinson project, see how it plays out, wonder how much time I will actually spend there, have to tutor Noagh tomorrow morning, so won't be there then and would like to go to Bronx Doc's open house tomorrow evening (early). Of course a lot depends on how I like what is there. Well, a good experience for a true "theater lover".
Rest of day kind of blank, will wait it out, probably will read some Tanner after finishing here. Some musings on my financial state. Think that I feel I would like to be more involved with what is happening at Friends, but
no students in school, only teachers so have to wait it out...this week kind of a strange no man's land for me. Anyway, free pizza on Sunday at South Fourth if I wish it....

sent claire....

the info re Peoples Climate arts, hope that she can use it. A little better today, Just got my ticket for Emily Dickinson marathon project---can move in and out any time I like. It begins tomorrow evening, for some strange reason I was sure it began on Friday. This moves everything around---means Sunday free. Also make some changes in today's plans. No tutoring today, tutored for two hours yesterday, good time with Kyla---so question seems to be what rest of the day will be like. Really should see the movie Boyhood, this might be my only chance, tomorrow evening do I go from Emily Dickinson to karaoke at South Fourth?
Doubtful, but these days, anything is possible.
Yesterday after tutoring for some reason could not read Tanner with much interest, returned home, slept, not sure about where to go from there. Had a beer at Irish bar on 72nd. Empty and boring. Then decided to go
to Lansdowne Road. Good idea, bartenders were very happy to see me, some good talks watching baseball, and of course, their delicious salads, overpriced (but what isn't now). Also a warm encounter with Sinem, my waitress from who works there. Left feeling very fulfilled.
Not much else to say, let us see how today turns out.

so...the summer....

is finally over. labor day weekend, the longest weekend of all. Yet I did so many things. As I sit in the library now, I await my tutoring session with Kyla later this afternoon, yet all seems raw and nerves. Why?
Did I accomplish a lot this weekend. Was I supposed to?
Friday: afternoon Syble's reading at NYTW. After that made decision to go to Standings for baseball immersion. Pretty sucessful, had a nice time, nice chat with a couple who lived in Manhattan, and good feedback from bartender Aaron. Did not say hello to Erin, who was bartending next door at Burp Castle.
Why? Keep putting off visiting her. Maybe this week...?
Saturday; very tired yet read Peter and the Starcatcher in preparation for my tutoring session today. Did not leave the neighborhood, something very rare for me. Saw A Most Wanted Man Saturday evening. First time in big theater on west side in a long time. Incredible tribute to Philip Seymour Hoffman. A remarkable performance, his cry in the last minutes of the movie, such a cry of pain, shows how much he had inside him. His performance, seen in tandem with his death, is revelatory. So much feeling inside of him.
Afterwards wandered over to Lincoln Center, watched end of Don Pasqale on big TV in front of Met.
Sunday, went to Mayday, participated in Climate Project arts building, simply cut star figures from oak tag. Really silly, right, yet went about doing it very seriously.A few nice conversations with some of the workers, always good to see Lucas. Have some ideas for the downstairs space which opens in November. Will see if I can make them work.
Afterwards, Jesse's reading and then late dinner at La Flaca. Nice to really see Bobby again. Two long walks, one from union square to HERE, one from HERE (spring street and sixth avenue) all thew way across town to La Flaca (Clinton and Grand). All the way through Soho and east.
Monday, good lesson with Noagh, helped him a lot, cook out, good conversations with Clint and activist Sara, and finally Onegin at Met, outside, one among about 800 spectators all seeing the opera for free, rapped to attention. A remarkable event for me, first time in a long time hearing the opera straight through, somehow in this setting could really get the feel for it. Then tired and off to bed.
Did not sleep fitfully any of the nights. always up around 3. Strange dreams, can't remember.
Today not sure after tutoring Kyla what I will do, probably stay in library and read one or two more of Tanner's explanations of Shakespeare's plays.