wednesday...feeling frenetic

had a nice night at South Fourth yesterday, had a goodd talk with a woman named Andi;she and her husband live in Crown heights, Antioch graduate, invited me to a burlesque Xmas show in a few weeks---will go---also should e-mail David patrick F.about listening to some Beethoven chamber music--good talk with him also.
Today about to take the bus, ran into Brandon and his aunt coming off bus, they want to see me tomorrow, didn't think I could do it, but schedule at Friends is as such that it might be possible, from, say 11A.M. to 12. Kind of rushed, but could do it---if there is no extra work for me. This afternoon interview with Painting Center people, wonder if there is work there, wonder about Orthodox Jew in Crown Heights (lives about a half mile from Andi) whom I might tutor, wonder if I will see Marriage of Figaro on Saturday.

Tuesday

First time at the computer in a few days. Have gone from darkness into light! Feeling exhilirated---just finished my secoond session in two days with Brandon---very productive,but yesterday was the key---"forced" myself to accept work at Brooklyn Tech---got through it---not great but---after having done it, I feel very fulfilled. This week later work at Friends, and some in January---also some work at Liz Yamin's art gallery---this plus the tutoring should keep my going---feel very optimistic---difficult weekend, Sunday night---really weird, but seem to have worked my way through it. Something about taking a sub job in a new place---responding to a new challenge (though Brooklyn Tech kids are hardly difficult) that makes me feel strong. How much more work will I do in the public schools.......?

Friday, Friday

Glad to see that my review of QB has been posted on NYtimes.com. Still, could not eat much until sharing that pizza at South Fourth at about 10:00 on Wednesday. Yesterday, got through most of the day before heading to Prospect Heights to have Thanksgiving Dinner with Carol, kayla, annie and family. Fun? Well, to some extent. The girls are really growing and changing--that is good to see.
Today.....bad feelings re playing horses, do not really want to do it, yet a part of me thinks I might implement my income if I am careful. Certainly, could have made money yesterday on McGlaughlin's horse, probably would have bet him, and yet, am I better off without it? It leaves a dirty taste in my mouth, and at this moment I find there is so much more interesting to do in the city. Yet, I won't bankrupt myself if I play one or two today, or try to play some of the interesting card tomorrow. Always a seesaw. Here I am in the library, why not just drown myself in the many books I find interesting. Always something more.
Can think of about eight movies to see today, and a few plays, trying to keep income low, we'll see..............

wednesday....

Wednesday, awoke with stomach ache! Must have been the combination of things that I ingested last evening: asparagus, a small beer, one slice pepirroni pizza, and (I know I shouldn't have) some cookies and cream ice cream from Haagen Daas. Anyway, glad I saw Queens Boulevard (the musical), thought that meeting Robin would be somewhat of a chore, but actually really enjoyed myself, both her company before the play, and the play (musical) itself.
This morning, absolutely no phone calls for subbing! Could not quite believe it---are they cutting back, were they all given out last night? Still the conundrum of trying to get myself to work somewhere else besides Friends if the work there is slow. But no real problem now. Could have probably arranged to tutor Brandon today, but I guess I will wait til Friday. Sort of glad to have the whole day open---absolutely no obligations--don't remember feeling so untrammeled. Also a beautiful day, mild, as will tomorrow be, but this topsy turvy weather still seems like a kind of joke played on all of us. Anyway, going to see Queens Boulevard and enjoying it as much as I did, has me very up---want to see more. Later......

Tuesday....

Another day without work!. Didn't mind too much this morning, since I am meeting Robin for dinner and the play, only got three phone calls---all these speciality schools, just created, how am I to figure out if they are viable or not---hopefully, work at Friends will be strong for December---also, talked to an interesting examiner at Department of Labor, re a claim for summer unemployment---seemed to have a viable understanding of my rights---so what happens now; there is a small chance I will get some summer money-we will see.
Thanksgiving on Thursday with the Schwarz-Baum's, should be fun, the girls are always a trip. Looking forward to it--saw the movie of Charles Nelson Reilly's last show---quite cathartic for me; I wonder what one not interested in theater, 50-64 would say about it. Not sure about work tomorrow---anyway, can visit Jeannine and Frank if I want.

Monday

Eshaustion! Emotional, not physical, this crazy quilt life---so much to do, yet turned down a job subbing at Brooklyn Tech this morning----certainly can't complain about being asked to work there--yet turned it down--simply could not include it in my consciousness, I guess--wonder about the next two days, what I will be able to do. No financial worries at the moment---but----tonight I tutor Jose, then will go to Jenny's reading, I guess, then home to the messages.
Went to see Twelfth Night for the second time Saturday, and amazingly enough, enjoyed it more---very moved at the end---sat next to Monica Witt, we had a nice time, then wandered about Brooklyn as I waited for Nila's 11:00 performance. That was fun---she was the best I have seen her, and had an interesting discussion with Stewart, Nila's dad.
Good session with Brandon A yesterday, glad he feels confident---then home to bed---could not do much else, too tired...then today.........

Saturday....

Second go round watching Twelth Night at Friends, this afternoon; had a beautiful day there yesterday----great relationships with the elventh graders. Feel like my relationship with the kids there is getting very "Checkovian"---what do I mean by that? Can't really say---let it continue---spoke to Adam K last night, tried to get him to send his play "Freedom High", to theaters in England, I think there would really be a market for it there---nice that he trusts me---trying to figure out what to do between Twelth Night and Nila's play at Here, which is at 11:00 P.M.---go to Williamsburg, or see a movie, or simply return back to the apartment---not sure.
Next week may have to really deal with my reluctance to try a new public school---what will happen?..........