He sits in a chair to the right of the entrance to Zabar's coffee shop, asking for money. How long have I known him---I think we first talked about thirty years ago--can it be that long---I had just survivied teaching at Morris High School in the Bronx, and when I mentioned that he told me he was raised in the projects that are directly east or Morris. It will be thirty years in November of this year that I spent my three months at Morris, so my conversation with this man must have been shortly after. Does he have shelter, or does he sleep in Riverside park? I have no idea; but when I see him, I always give him a dollar. He is greatful; he responds usually with a sincere "thank you" and we talk briefly about the weather, or something like that. I did not expect to give him any money today, but on the way back from my browse session at Barnes and Noble, I decided I would check to see if he was there, and give him his usual dollar. Afterwards, I realized that he was my only human contact of the day---and that this contact invigorated me.. As limited as his life may be, we have a bond---and today it became very meaningful.
What else...? Well, I was successful in not giving in to my betting "fervor" yesterday afternoon; I did, however, follow through on placing a bet on the Chiefs in the Super Bowl. You know what happened in that game...ironically the two bets that I did not make would have been successful. Still, I needed the calm, yesterday afternoon. Now I don't have that much money left so I have to be careful. I am not planning to bet tonight---I will see how I feel tomorrow afternoon about placing bets on that evening's games The NBA season is a long one---will have plenty of time and choices in the next few weeks.
Tomorrow at 7:15 in the morning, I meet with the nurse practioner who works with the radiologist-oncologist who is in charge of my radiation treatment. She will do some preliminary stuff-then I will meet with the doctor. Radiation should start a few days after--then when that is finished, still a while until surgery. A long haul? Maybe, but I can do it--it's already been five months after the first operation, and I have dealt with it "one day at a time." I don't feel deprived---probably because so many people I know who are not sick are staying indoors all the time. There is a logic to each day---I seem to be able to carry through on that logic and move on to the next moment. I will know more when tomorrow's meetings are over---will report soon.
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