of "bricks and windows, windows and bricks"

 Have just watched a little bit of the 1999 revival of Death of a Salesman, the one that began at the Goodman Theater in Chicago and moved to Broadway a year later. Brian Dennehy played Willie, and one of the reasons that I did not rush to see it was that I had trouble accepting him as Willie--too large, not vulnerable enough in my opinion. While I won't say the streaming actually bears this out, I still would like to see a smaller, hungrier actor in the role. Willie is constanI tly searching for recognition, somehow, I don't see someone who looks like Dennehy having that problem. Still, a lot of people I know or heard speak of the revival felt it was very powerful.

   First really got into the play in my junior year at Hopkins when we did it. I tried out for Willie, gave what I thought was a very good audition, but was cast as Charlie instead. I was also allowed to assistant direct; that turned out to be fruitful. it was the first time I worked with actors---a good experience. Playing "uncle" Charlie, such a passive type was a drag, but in the end, not casting me as Willie was of major importance. After Hopkins, in my 20's, while I was living in NY and "finding myself", there was a double edged sword to my existence, On one hand, I was felt disappointed: where had the energy and force and inventiveness of my senior year at Hopkins gone to? Here I was doing social work, outside of the artistic world I felt that I belonged in and could compete in. On the other hand I was in my twenties, being all things that twenty somethings are---socially finding out about myself, etc. I needed to not be involved in theater, just to get my bearings as a person. Still, I was angry that my "senior Hsopkins self" ---the leader and inventive head of the school theater group, the Barnstormers, was lying dormant. Playing Willie---success of failure---would have been simply another rebuke, another reminder that I had walked away from my what I had accomplished at Hopkins---something that I would have to live down.

Anyway, here I sit, many years later, looking at the whole thing. Still, let's think about the play---how did a thirty three year old man have such insight into his characters as Miller did. Sometimes I think that is amazing. For this production I watched a few scenes, felt that I had seen as much as I needed to. It is a "quiet" day--I am on my own, and so will probably read a bit and listen to the radio before the football game (Giants-Eagles) that I have invested my own money in. Nothing much else to say, will report soon.