feeling much better....

after a convivial afternoon at South Fourth--now on to Cymbeline (fight the tiredness). Yes, interesting how mellow city boy becomes when interacting with others, unlike when he is by himself. But that seems to be the more instructive way, actually had some good political discussions today. First day in a while with no tutoring, but things seem a little empty without it, anyway, as I said before onwards to Cymbeline---hopefully, our imagination will be sated.

much later

two good days at Friends last week---the tutoring continues apace, but......lots of contrasts to deal with. Can't seem to release any money to myself for entertainment---nights, waking up in darkness, hard time coming to terms with my "aloneness". For all the tutoring, still miss not working during the day---no calls from DOE today; wonder whether that will continue......need to work out of the whole thing...tonight...we should stop by South Fourth, need some contact, after that...........

much later.....

about two weeks as such...here in the 145 street library. Just finished reading the Times editorial about bail outs of banks----really frightening, depressing how one set of rules seems to apply to those people and another to myself. ofcourse, this is a difficult time as I transition back to teaching, and the school year is just beginning, but still one must live with the fact that one part of the citizenry gets bailed out for irresponsability, while another....and then one takes ones mind off that with talk of sports or theater or culture, or whatever, but....a tough call.
Even during the fringe, with all the fun that I had, the energy is exactly the same as last year's. There is no sense of the issues that we face. Is there a way of combining the two...? More people will be involved in watching football this Sunday, then in the health care issue. Well, a gut feeling now of sorrow, anger-----great trip last night around the west village, totally self contained, architecture intact, what stories the houses could tell. Long trips also through Brooklyn on Sunday and Monday. Seems like all I could do is walk on those two days. Missing students, phone is off...may meet them here later---will check......

It has been....

a long time, since the last post. Yesterday, in the midst of incredible heat, NY was alive with theater goers, I know, since I box officed at the Fringe. Quality of the plays seems irrelevant---very dissappointed with a three person take on Macbeth---maybe it is becoming more of a social committment. Anyway, no problems (really?) and woke up today feeling tired, but now I am in Brooklyn--thank god! great way to take a break-will return to my box office and more adventures tomorrow.
After the rush and energy of the fringe, Brooklyn seems warm and mellow, perhaps not a good day to Fringe myself, but probably will. Still have not heard from the Vasquez' re Chelsea, expected her to be back from Ecuador by now, but I guess not. Slower schedule this week means more free time, meanwhile...........

rourgh time....

at Fringe, where I have been workingg since Friday---very hectic but feel a part of it. Yesterday for the second show, lots of walk ups of all different categories-----felt hassled by the end, a little bit of an explosion, but things seem to have turned out all right. part of it is that I feel dissappointed in myself, maybe my focus could have been better---still subjected to all sorts of self serving, unaware behvavior. See what happens today, probably will be better when I am there to focus.
Not much else to report---last Monday and Tuesday at South Fourth were very good. Still greatful for the friends I have made and relationships that I have built there. Still at this moment, South Fourth seems like a world away---the relationships distant. Possible to return before Fringe ends....not sure.
Working hard with Miguel, the coffee makers son, this is fun; Chelsea will return soon....

strange day...

on the same day that I lose out on 15 dollars because my student cancels, I read an article about Rocco Landesman (same initials) and his rise to the top. What makes his aggressiveness, his need to live well, a diferent kind of need then mine. You have never been aggressive with money, always try to be in control, are respected for your decency to people and perhaps fairness. That is fine, but is there really any difference between us in the real world of being? I suppose what I am asking is that if you wanted to be successful in theater, why didn't on some level you do what he did? Different breaks...he was mentored by Brustein, was able to function as a student in a much more creative and supportive atmosphere, you, mentored by nobody. When I leave here, everything will be okay, but you have always tried to rein in your aggressiveness. Strange meditation on being...wonder where this will all lead to, will I see Chuck Mee's play today? Fringe begins next Friday, have a very easy schedule. On Wednesday another walk---this one after leaving Tony Avella's benefit (had some nice conversations there) then up to Avenue C, first few blocks north of Houston still have a Puerto Rican flavor, then around fifth street the street explodes into upscale and semi-upscale restaurants, it seems crowded, vivid, but the same types of people---although Avenue C and the block to the east has been gentrified for about ten years now, still amazed by the amount of well to do, or "normal" (By that I mean white and middle class) that have found the street and go there without any trouble. These journeys excite and make me feel good, but what do they mean?

so we wandered...

around the city last night, actually the "we" was "me", but it was an incredible trip, beginning at the Film Forum, then down to HERE, where I will be working, then accross Broome Street to Crosby, checking out the trip to Fringe Central (not a long one, by far), then finishing up on Spring until it hits the newly refurbished Bowery, then hitting Rivington going as far as Suffolk, where the Milagros venue for the Fringe will be, wanted to see how far it was, if one was to make the trip twice----pretty far, pretty long haul especially in the summer heat and humidity.
So what did I see? Well, the upscale restaurants that I passed were full of people, no recession there, also got a chance to see the many new buildings that have been built or refurbished on the lower east side in the past few years. It seems like there is one or two on every block. So what does that mean, and where are you in this? Realized that a real estate investment in the area in the late eighties or early nineties would have made an amazing profit. Realized that you are not in that at all. Other things, maybe later---anyway, tonight the Avella fund raiser, should be fun and interesting, glad I am doing it--the days to the Fringe grow nearer--my venue, HERE will be incredibly pleasant---looks like I have lucked out there, that is all..........

bewitched, bothered and....

so on. With two weeks to go, city boy is restless! Actually it is not two weeks, more like 12 days, or maybe 11. But still time to get through, rather than congradulating yourself on your excellent money management, city boy, you can never satisfy yourself enough. Still ambivalent about the horses---had a nice time last night watching Cunningham dancers---thought, while watching them last night, that we have come so far since Papp set down his actors (or whatever) in the Amphitheater on the East River off the projects in 1954, or thereabouts. Now, free art for everyone, then it seemed unheard of--but what of the audience, this one, mostly white, middle-upper class, is this who free art is intended for---have to go to Von King Park in Bed-Stuy to discover if poorer people really participate in this.
Found out that my schedule at the FRinge this year is fairly easy, atleast in comparison to other scehedules. Good or bad? Cityboy always feels a little guilty if he doesn't carry his full share, but may turn out to be a blessing, since it will give me more time to work with Chelsea when she returns. Lots of wandering this week...? since it may be cityboy's last chance.

Sunday morning...

didn't think that I would find myself in the Fordham Library at 10:00 A.M., but that is exactly where I am. Why? Got up early, read the News and had coffee, and at 8:15, all dressed up with no where to go. So, soon it was time to get on the 2 to 149 street, and then take a Concourse bus up to Fordham, and here I am. Some views about the Concourse: the area from 149 street to 166 street seems slightly gentrified, after that, the environment seems mostly working class with very few exceptions. Ofcourse, I may be wrong, but that was my perception.
Yesterday, a nice afternoon at South Fourth, had some interesting conversations, then bussed to Amalgamated Bank on Fulton near Bedford, then to Outpost, then to Vanderbuilt and a return to Plan B. How was it? Well, it (the weather, that is) was incredibly hot and humid; Plan B was friendly, but it still has an insiders vibe. A little annoyed when the Friday bartender sat down next to me, and, talking to the bartender, who is also the owner, described a coupling he had the night before just as he was closing up. I wonder if that's why I made a hasty exit, and left a "decent", but not great tip. Found myself incredibly tired, almost knocked out, but that did not prevent me from walking to Park Place, getting the Q, switching at Atlantic to the 3, and heading home. Fell asleep immediately, ofcours awoke, drenched in sweat at around 2P.M. Made it through the night, but very restless, that is why I am here. But revivied and exhilirated, (somewhat moderately) by the trip to the library, soon the Fringe will be here, and I will have more structure. Later.................

feeling....

well, I'm not sure---yesterday had one of the most social days in recent times---three conversations with three different women---getting there, city boy. Plus a good bacon lettuce and tomato sandwich at Kellog diner (williamsburg) that was very inexpensive. But today, fraught with a kind of anxiety---need to write something but don't know if writing on daily kos about Central Park and bank of america (this impressed Hope a great deal yesterday) is what I want to do. Saturday, wandered again around Prospect Heights, mostly Washington Avenue, getting to like that coffee place just south of Saint Marks avenue---ah taking a bus through Brooklyn, for some reason, it really hits the spot, yet how many of them will I have time to take before the fringe, and what about my participation with FUNY? And what happened today with the Coney Island vote by City Council?........

saturday afternoon....

have just completed a tutoring session with Eliseo, and a little bit with Ruthie. This is a very different experience---forgot just how fulfilling and interesting a session with a student could be. Feeling very focused in a way that I havn't in a while. Four weeks before the Fringe begins, and only, as of now, one tutoring session per week. The rest......Well, there is the group, and some organizing and some writing for them. Then there is the endless socializing, mostly (but not all) at South Fourth, sometimes fulfilling, sometimes not . Goes in glitches. Then there are the walks yesterday in the Bronx, an interesting walk from Tremont and Concourse, to Burnside to University, to Sedgwick (where I had never been before---somewhat luxury houses in the"South Bronx", I wonder when they had been built) back to Tremont to University, then the bus to Washington Heighs, where the prices for food had gone up a lot. Felt nervous this moring re money, but far more relaxed after this session. Tonight, possible to see one man show based on the performer's father's passion for Wintereise, a song cycle of incredible bleakness by Schubert----idea sounds fascinating. Other visits, other boroughs, miss Vox Pop, perhaps will arrive there later to read....or perhaps....

an exhausting week.....

Good meeting Tuesday evening, good conversations yesterday and Wednesday---poetry reading at South Fourth tomorrow...fun?......today, again crammed with choices, expectations, needs, etc. but still not sure where the "road" (kind of pretentious) will lead.

Sunday morning...

stomach filled, much eating yesterday and Friday, also much walking---Friday another "monster walk" from South Fourth to Fulton and Bedford, but quite exciting. Today, meeting Alvin at Toast this evening, which kind of makes me not too clear about what to do this morning and afternoon---yesterday spent almost nothing---very good, also taught Carolyn about horse racing---she wants to go to Belmont on Wednesday, guesss we will do it---really amazing how clear my instructions to her were---today probably back to Brooklyn, should take a rest from South Fourth, have spent a lot of time there in the last few days, give it a break---other places....? Maybe a movie or Staten Island yanks game, wonder...will continue reading Richard Price's book---otherwise, will improvise my way though it......

a long and arduous few....

days, sitting here in the library, feeling like my brain is fried. However, did accomplish first diary, that was important. On the more human side, really nice time at South FOurth last night--will probably return there tonight to see Adam before he goes, then spend the next few afternoons there, watching baseball. Really feel a need to chill out---very dissapointed by Twelth Night in the park on Tuesday, everything on one level, however, more depressing was the statement at the beginning about Bank of America supporting the Public. Hello....is that the very same Bank of America which gave mortgages to hoboes in Florida and California, so they could repackage them and sell them to other banks. Need to have a dialogue re this with someone, meanwhile, the audience acted like obedient children, not much more. Love to spend the rest of the afternoon simply browsing theater and sports sites...will I.....?

Monday..after

yesterday's long and absolutely fulfilling walk through Brooklyn, beginning at Cortelyou Road (found a new sports bar on Coney island avenue) and ending at Avenue J---really interesting, saw the estates, the old apartment houses, the morphing of the neighborhood from Jamaican to Jewish, the constant reminders of the Jewish Bronx and Brooklyn of my childhood---I am still overwhelmed by the architecture and what it evokes in my life.
Following that a long and productive night at South Fourth----what follows, well the other blog may begin tomorrow, but cityboy will try to be faithful and check in with his old blog.

waking up happy....

and energetic---interesting visit to Long Island City to Chocolate factory to see Caucasian Chalk Circle, lots of what seems to be new shops and a few bars in this area, also a great deal of highrises (are they filled), but a kind of funky (if "yuppieish") taste to the neighborhood, might be good to explore at some point---enjoyed the play, cast full or energy, very talented, another young group with great skills, they seem to be all over the city now.
Jury duty over---short stay, only 80.00, now most of the time is yours, will be interesting to see how it plays out---tonight atleast three stops: Cherry Tree with Mat at 6:30; Shawn's going away party, and then my buddies at 113. No South Fourth tonight, (maybe a bit this afternoon) and then tomorrow, hopefully will do some petitoning with Arlene in the area.
Still would love to immerse myelf in baseball, see King and I, next Saturday, but...other things must be more important......

so Friday....

at 1:33 P.M. I found myself in Brooklyn, at the library at Grand Army Plaza. Arrived here after finishing jury duty---two days (actually 1 and one half) where nothing happened, no jury brought in to see a judge--things are kind of slow. Got my $80.00, but would have liked to sit on a jury, for all the waiting time, to make a bit more. Now, still waiting to hear about possible tutoring for the summer---only Eliseo and Ruthie are definites until Chelsea returns. still surprised that I havn't heard from the Fringe people, about doing a box office again this year, that is what I want to do, but with Chelsea coming back it would be difficult, kind of a marathon, anyway, let us wait and see.
Anchored to New York atleast for now, last night, as usual a good evening at South Fourth, had not seen Adam in a while, that was fun, otherwise, the usual suspects, still I must admit, how much that place has worked for me---really met some great people. Where it all ends....who knows, next week begin other blog, you will have to see that to believe it.....

fun time......

did not think I would enjoy it, but the trip out to Hempstead to see Guy (the son of Harold) play football, the game and the ensuing return actually turned out to be a lot of fun. Really good chemistry between me and the guys, too bad we can't do some more of this. But I liked being there, taking the whole thing in. Otherwise, followed through on James T's request, and will continue to search for other meaningful articles about the city races coming up. Jury duty probably begins tomorrow; hope I get more than a few days, also just found out about concert at Mannes tonight with Leo S. will try to go....more about Jury duty (if it happens) later

Some good things.....

should be happening---nice to read the atlantic yards article on Froomkin, and the need to" identify bullshit"---also nice to read at Mr. Sullivan, the lone dissenter on the Mayor's Education committee.
Yesterday, went to the lounge on 106 street,between 3rd and Lex----to hear Mike play. An interesting bar, very heavily hispanic---felt like an outsider, but for the most part, everyone very cordial to me. Good place to know about, low pressured bar, it seems like one can stay there as long as one likes, good TV screens for the games, and it seems like the food is very good. Another revelation was walking down Lex from96 street, to 106 street---a trip that I would have dreaded about 12 years ago, and yet with the exception of the projects,which take up the 98-99 street block, area has become very gentrified. An upscale Italien bistro on the northeast corner of 100th or 101st looked very shi-shi. Still, too much buidling---the whole west side of97-98 street looks like it is slated for another high rise. Anyway, intersting night, and it was fun to walk down Lexington Avenue between 79 and 106 street.
Today,the second installment ofthe EST plays---including one by "my" playwright, M.Z. Ribalow. Wonder how many people I willsee there whom I know. Afterwards will end up atSouth Fourth, but before......? See what the whether is like on leaving EST.......

Last night....

returned to Pete's Candy Store to hear the Medicine Woman band, which Layla, a bartender at Bembe is a member of. The bar is great----if you are with someone, probably the perfect place for a late or mid evening conversation---casual or other, but by one self, if one is not a drinker, well.....had to leave there quickly, after the performance ended. Weekend looks crowded, will I do some work for Thompson this weekend...? that is the big question, is the momentum shifting----well probably not yet, but the perception that Thompson (or Avella) cannot win must be stopped. Had a nice time on Monday as I finally hit Freddy's---again not the best place to be by oneself, but still, Mike the bartender was friendly, would be nice to return, probably more fun (and interesting) at around 11p.m.---but that is late for you cityboy, and the train is a little far, anyway, let's see how it goes, plenty of plays to see---movies----I wish, let's see how it all plays out

furious pace

City boy wants to report....can't

but what is to be done......?

Filling the gap. Which shall it be?

four plays in.....

well, we did it! The theater lover in city boy emerged this weekend, and it was theater all the way! Feel exhilirated by this, knew atleast one person in each play I saw, that helped, even though I was not invited out by any----stopped by Heights Cafe on Friday---same old, same old---but paid some dues, today feeling kind of relaxed and easy, not missing work, finances seemingly in good shape, looking forward to the condensed "Light" tomorrow and the graduation on Monday. Essentially in a good place.........

four plays in.....

yes, that is true, city boy is actually seeing (or plan s to see) four plays in four days. Yesterday saw Cyndi Hopkins' the success of failure (or maybe it is the other way around) which was quite amazing---she has an amazing intstrument. Today, Jen's play, then possibly off to that party for lab 113 on Adelphi Street----then, well you know---city boy, you always deal with the frenetic, never the pensive.....why is that? Why not write about the women you sat next to yesterday at the play, and why you did not speak to her.....? Huh....? City boy, are you hiding something? But today is today, and much to do before Strangers (jen's play) , possibly see exhibit in downtown Brooklyn---don't walk too much today city boy, you need your strength for the evening's activities.

busy week....

did not expect to work after Monday, at friends, but to my surprise, not only did I work the last three days of the week, but Wednesday and Thursday's work days were some of the longest that I had. Got through them though, feeling comfortable as the weekend, long for sure, closes in, debating whether to see Desire this afternoon, then in the evening, seeing the play with Jen.
Long walks: Yesterday, all through Bushwick, south to North, then to the beginning of Bed-Stuy, on Sunday, down Vanderbuilt Avenue for a long way, before taking the G to the burg. All in all an interesting week---see how the holidays impact our lives.......

the two days.....

came and went, somewhat clunkily, the change in structure can be very difficult, nevertheless returned to Friends yesterday, and in the middle of the day was told by Hugo F that I was to be on his Dodgeball team. Okay, figured other faculty members might participate as well, but found myself the only adult present, as the teams warmed up. As it turned out, only one other team had a faculty member, and my team, believe it or not, won two games, before being defeated by a group of mostly (all?) seniors. A lot of fun, surprised that I could do it, but not too tired today. Lots of stuff going on, heard from a cousin that her daughter has a project at Beacon High school, terrible hours, re my schedule, but may go anyway. Preakness today, also South Fourth, also want to see Bobby at 113 before he leaves for Europe, but that is this evening, which is a long time from now.

so much has happened....

in the past ten days---trip to Baltimore turned out to be very good, really wanted to go there---walked endlessly, memories really came back, but I think that turned out to be cathartic (what Do I mean.....? more on that later) what is my relationship with the city....? Meanwhile, back in NY, have not done much but sub, tutor and sleep; interesting offer made to me by Katie at South fourth street about writing for her Bartender site, should I do that or should I see movies, can I do both...? Today on the subway, going to Chelsea's house, saw a black woman yelling at her baby, who was obviously frightened, lots of people on the train, could have gone over and said something---didn't, do not feel to good about that---easier to fantasize being a non-conformist among my generation, but then again, you spend very little time with those people anyway. Where to from here......might have some rest the next two days......Possible..?

somethng I forgot...

to report, did see Julia Migenes at Brooklyn College last Sunday, must have been one of the youngest people in the audience, or atleast it seemed that way---Ms. Migenes' show was somewhat ludicrous--though I respect her as an artist, she opted for simple ideas---still she sings very well. Afterwards walked west to along ave. I, thought I would take the train to Prospect Heights, but was only running towards Coney Island, so I walked---endlessly, until the pizza place on Cortelyou---had a nice stay at the Connecticut Muffin down the block, then ended up on Church, decided to take Church avenue bus to NY avenue, then bedford bus into williamsburg---that is what I did, quite fascinating, seeing the past, an area similar to the one I grew up in in the Bronx---these things are very important to me. Most interesting street corner was New York and Bergen Street, really beutiful apartment houses, look placid at this point, then down the Bedford bed-stuy trail to Williamsburg---can't seem to get enough of those bus rides, but probably not this weekend.

Trip to Baltimore is.....

on. Just picked up ticket at Penn Station for next Saturday at 7:00 A.M. Pretty easy. Will stay at Broadview, around Hopkins, see Wild Duck in the evening, looking forward to seeing what the new theater company that is supposed to be very good will do with it. Probably had to add a lot of actors for opening scene at least---play is very tricky, can be overdone very easily. At any rate, should be fun to go back there---tomorrow take the senior class studying New York city on the walk that Pam and I took a few weeks ago. Should be interesting to see how they respond to it.
Just spent about 40 dollars on the Derby and a few other races---at this point feel relaxed by it, will probably stay after the Derby to hang out at South fourth, spend some time going over the Tony nominations with Kim--really behind on plays, don't know if I can catch up--next week only Tuesday and Thursday, and even those are somewhat cramped. We'll see......

now it is a...

week later, and have not posted because I have been working so much--yes at Friends, yesterday a gigantic day of taking actually two teacher coverages and running up and down stairs at a frantic pace--but still strong enough to see "Actors Nightmare" in afternoon, and the "Battle of bands" at Friends in the evening, return their on Monday and Tuesday, trying to get other things in, but seems hard....basically quite content---gave up a chance to help Thompson get his Mayoral bid off the ground, simply did not feel I could participate at this time. Tomorrow, might see Juila Migenes, really don't want to go inside on such a sultry day, (or so it is promised) but feel a "kinship" with her---she is after all, my age, and would love to hear her anecdotes, so will probably commit via audience extras. Anyway, it will be good to look around that neighborhood in Brooklyn, so place I really don't know that much about, last there around 2002. Will probably go to Baltimore in two weeks, atleast that is what is in my head, today will hang a bit out in Williamsburg---have to think a little about the Bronx trip next weekend---frantic, see what I mean, would like to see both the Durang and Lucas play at the Public, your move........

a week later.....

sit in lincoln center library, aware that the reunion at Hopkins is going on and I am not part of it.
Certainly I miss it, would have loved to see Malcolm Kahn again, have nothing but positive and gentle feelings for him, but life seems to be so immediate now, that it is better that I am here. I am amazed at how close the last reunion, five years ago seems. Might have been interesting to naviagate the different strands of emotion and participation that I would have found at the reunion, but the parties tonight are important. Still very depressed by the Yankee stadium committments, but spent a nice two hours at Standings yesterday, the guys that I knew were very sweet about my returning after a long absense. Ditto my buddy Luis at Left Bank in Prospect Heights. God, life is a cabaret, or atleast a pub crawl, anything to forget the engulfment of the city by.....anyway, looking forward to FRiends next week, will report soon.......

and now it is (once again)

Saturday---just finished tutoring Eliseo at the library, very fulfilling, but yesterday, what an eighth period at Friends, those kids demand a lot! Found myself incredibly tired afterwards, retrurned home and tried to sleep, awakened by Michael's (my friend) phone call, not much too report after that could not sleep, but far too tired physically to do anything, funny thing is that as I sit here around noon, still feeling very tired---had hoped to see a couple of plays this weekend, but....tonight will go to Henry Street because I want to "hang" with Jen (and her friends) so rather then seeing something I wanted to, (though I was not "acheing" to see anything) will see this take on Beowulf. Tomorrow, maybe Pericless---let's see how I am feeling physically will probably visit South fourth as well.....that's all

and now it is.....

at the Schwarz-Baum's

Just finished the Passover service with those my studious and graceful cousin Jessie, and her madwoman of a sister Molly and her very mad friend Moie. But deep down inside they are very bright young women. Although they have a tendency to behave slightly mad. But the food was very good, and the company was good. Stomach is adequate, should not have any cake. Tomorrow at Friends, must be there early to prepare for proctoring Sarah's test.

Thursday......began.....

with reading with Eliseo at 145 street library---now I sit two blocks away at the computer place, hoping for a little relaxation, but enraged by reading the Tax Forum's evaluation of the Yankee Stadium tax breaks---finally begin to understand it----better reason not to go to the reunion next week---anyway, the theater events taking place are more valuable to me at this point, also last reunion seems so immediate to me (though it was 5 years ago) can really visiualize meeting people, just don't feel a tremendous need to do it again---really don't want to be invited to anyone's houses---I guess this my highly independant period------tonight at the Schwarz-Baum's Passover Seder---always fun----I really enjoy it---fun to see the girls. Tomorrow, important proctoring for Sarah at Friends, with those seventh graders, expect quite a challenge, so I guess I will be going right home after the Seder (which is what I have to do anyway, being, as always, so full)

four days later and.....

Odets' Paradise Lost---read the first act this morning, truly brilliant. Anyway, four days later and when I wrote the last post had no idea that Wednesday I would be working not one, but two shifts at Friends---yesterday as well. Felt very strong this morning, looks like Reunion will not be imminent, forgot to sent e-mail to Sarah, should do it now, not sure of what happens after this, should go to Museum of City of NY to check out pictures of burnt out Bronx---tomorrow....four off off Broadway plays interesting, but all only have Saturday evening performances, and also want to keep pace up, kind of tired, will see what arrives.

off the schneid......

finally moved into working at another school; got job at Lab School, good location, a nice deal being part of a class taught by a second teacher, and finally a good relationship with the kids. Returning there on Thursday, and will be at Friends on Friday---sounds good enough. Otherwise, things continue to be hectic, do not think I will attend the reunion, but that could change---very ambivalent. Will tutor today, then not sure about the night---last night an interesting conversation with a young man at Amsterdam Ale house, you see , some interesting things arise, outside of South fourth.

so anyway,

went to Pianos to hear Nila and friends last night; not terribly successful, in terms of hearing her, because the place was packed, much too overpacked, and I felt uncomfortable and left after the second song. Revealing evening, because Ludlow Street in this area is packed around 10:00 P.M., so much for the recession, filled with kids, but did check out a sport bar across the street from Pianos called THe Blue Seats, got a nice vibe from it, though it is kind of expensive; many other bars in a four block surrounding area, all seemed to be doing passably well, meanwhile, the transit problem, the deficit problem, where are we in all this?
Otherwise, a nice time at South fourth yesterday afternoon with Julianne and Patrick and other assorted characters; feeling kind of mellow today, the weekend filled with many options, how will it end.....?

later....

slept, but awoke around 8, and though I thought I might be too tired, repaired to South Fourth, arrived there about 10 or 11, (not sure) but had very good talk with Brit and husband (hers) Rory about special ed classes, and their value. Then hung around a bit to talk to others, Kim gave me her report about Happiness, then went home around 1, but stopped off to say hi to harold at 113. That was fun, but crowded, got out of their quickly, and headed home. The next two days have been ones of rest, and some anxiety, re accepting jobs at DOE while I wait for FRiends to reopen, but today, in spite of a terrible night with no heat, feel incredibly relaxed, may pick up a new student, much to see and do, again, one million options. Talk later.........

yesterday...

at South fourth, good time chatting with Julianne. The American Plan that evening, far better than I expected---was seriiously moved....finally today, a long walk from west Bronx to east Bronx with Pam, amazing how easy the walk was. later.......

angry because.....

i could have subbed at Lab school today, and turned it down. Why? told myself i wasn't sure how good it was---when in fact I had heard from many others it was good. when will all this end.....anyway, see if the absense of work today will accomplish anything. tomorrow I meet Pam in the Bronx--we will walk around the two neighborhoods that I wish to show the kids---all transitional. Rest of the day...will "hang" at South fourth for a while, after this, then go see American Plan tonight. Still up in the air about baltimore trip---oh well, what is new.....?

in Brooklyn......

now---a moment ago as I stood by the window, I thought it would just be the most wonderful thing to follow the road outside the library south as far as I could go. Especially on a day like this. Brooklyn means walking---but what of the other stuff---a rough night last night, couldn't go anywhere, and did not sleep well---anyway, it is over now, and the big event for the day will be my visit with the dentist, later this afternoon, then to hear Ron read his short passage at 6:30.
Rest of the day will be taken by my journey to South Fourth, hang out there a little before returning to Manhattan. Friends vacation is taking a little more of a toll then I thought, may mean some changes for next week----but what......?

for some reason......

very exasperated this morning; can't seem to find the good in anything---had a nice night at South Fourth last evening---but------always limiting my final activity---is that it? Should I expand? Today, want to go to see something, but how about trying a new place, like Craft bar, or some other place. Even if it does not go well....does it matter? You have what you have. Anyway, should feel better after tutoring Chelsea (canceled yesterday) Still have not made up my mind re reunion----wonder what that will bring......

at the library....

at Lincoln Center, sit patiently as I write this. Friends is on hiatus for two weeks, means that I have a decent amount of time to (somewhat) relax in. Will probably see what is offerered a few times on sub central, but don't feel a lot of pressure to take jobs.
Great time at South Fourth on Thursday, a nice conversation with Kathy, then a good talk with Sonya. This was a really good transaction between us, unlike a few others, where I saw that she needed support, and I was very clear about helping her, and she was very clear about telling me what troubled her. Left feeling very good. May return there tonight, though I doubt I will have the time, but definitely tomorrow, for Patrick's party.
Today two plays, the Charles Busch one in the afternoon, and Reasons to be Pretty in the evening. Not in live with Neil La Bute, but if it is free---why not?
Next week will meet Pam in the Bronx, in preparation for the tour with with kids, want to make it good....that's all now.....

feeling very.....

relaxed---after last night and the performance at Friends---ofcourse enjoyed it heartily---now I have three days of work there next week, which should be good. Everything good today, a beautiful day---but breathed in horrid air at 96 street station---seems to be still in my lungs---making this up.....we will see--wondering what will happen about tonight---Frank seems to have gotten the wrong info or the wrong play--one or the other--well, plenty of other options, a beautiful day to walk around---anyway, we will see....

thinking about.....

many things---today is the first two day tutoring day I have had in a long time. Things are hectic-no work at Friends for tomorrow, but will work Monday, and see the Sound of Music on Friday. Atleast three tutoring sessions over the weekend...more....have not been to South Fourth in a while, because of the work and the cold, reunion....or no reunion....shall be determined.

alot of time spent...

in the Bronx, since the last report. Yes, I was there on Saturday evening, to work with Alejandra and Martha, on Olinville Avenue, and then yesterday, early with Fernanda (some good work) and then off to Southern Boulevard and 183rd Street. Hard to lie: some anxiety in entering that project, the elevator is like a box with no windows, a little scary--however once I found the apartment, had a really good lesson with Cristina, the youngest of the two Hernandez daughters--taught her how to divide, and she seemed very happy---not sure if I will continue, but going there is certainly different from going to the Brachmantes, or Fernanda and mom who live in my old neighborhood. Afterwards, jumped on the Southern Boulevard bus, could have taken it all the way to 145 and Amersterdam, but got off at Tremont (177 street) then proceeded to walk west all the way up to the Concourse. Avenue was thriving, in that there was much activity on the street--passed two blocks away from where my mother taught at JHS 44. Long, arduous, but necessary walk, much more interesting than taking the bus, at the end, as I approached to Concourse, found the front of what was the Devon movie house, a neighborhood theater that showed double features of two first run features, after they had exhausted their original runs.
It was there, right before I began sohpmore year at Science, that I saw the double feature of Somethng of Value (poitier) and the amazing A Face in the Crowd.
When did it end, I wonder, when was the last movie shown there, the last double bill, how far was the neighborhood in transition at that time---questions, questions, it all comes down to the story of the two worlds. Anyway........

just quickly......

Have worked all week---tired, now have two days of five tutoring sessions---all to the good, financially---had some good days at FRiends, and do not have to work that much in the next two weeks. Sitting in Bronx Library now, after having taken a humongous walk from 180 street 2 station, to Kingsbridge and Fordham. A little tired, not hungry at all, checked out 760 East 183rd street where I will tutor tomorrow, security seems good---after that, off to Borough Park, should be an exciting day, today just will return to West Side, then go back to the Bronx (second trip!) to work with both Brachmante girls, then hopefully have enough energy left to visit Bobby and Wayne at South Fourth. Not much else to say, will continue...........

an uneventful....

day seems planned--just off to Williamsburg, maybe see Liz' painting at 319 Bedford, then watch some basketball and have some conversation at South fourth. Tonight they have the Academy awards party---not too anxious to see them, but probably will be there, if it is not too crowded. Would love to go to invited dress of WSS, but don't know anyone involved. Foolish to think it could duplicate the original, as it stands now, simply one new production of it. Otherwise, not much is happening, should be a long week workwise, a lot of traveling and atleast three (if not more) days of subbing. That's it for now......

so a few.....

days later, I sit here in the library kind of exhuasted---but feeling very different from the last post. What's new?
First, the new student, Elizabeth turned out to be very nice, though not greatly motivated. But I think that I will work well with her---looks like I will see her twice a week through middle of March, after that atleast once---means I will be tutoring every day of the next two weeks, excluding Friday---so a lot of time will be used. This plus atleast three days of work at Friends, means there will not be much free time.
Good to see Three Sisters at Harlem Stage last evening, made me think a lot about it, even if production is pretty uneven, still a good version for the uninitiated, and eighty plus year old Earle Hyman is remarkable as ferapont.
Some good days at Friends, draught seems to be over for now, feel very much a part of things.
Would have liked to see Onegin tonight, atleast two acts of it, but much too tired, as it is will try to get to Brooklyn to see exhibit with Liz Yamin's work in it, then back to Trinity to see girls play then.....well we will consider options and body feeling. Tomorrow, may need some time to regroup before long next week, but may go to Oscar Party at South Fourth in the evening. For the rest.....we will see

the good and the bad....

the good: new student today in Bay Ridge. May lead to more work. Parents are friends of Martha, the fourth grader that I tutor.
the bad: missed a chance to sub for Crystal today----very annoyed. Really wanted to be with those kids. Still, by the time I was ready to leave for Bay Ridge, I would have been very tired. So we will see if fortune really was going in the right direction for this one.
Wrote a blog for Sunday at Fordham Library, that was erased. I was in a pretty upbeat mood for that one. Just came from a good session with Fernanda, the seventh grader whom I work with.
That evening, good walk through Fort Greene, down DeKalb, ending at Rustiks, a bar off Franklin on Dekalb. The band I came to see was not playing there, and Tommy was nice enough to drive me back to South Fourth.
Impressions of Rustik: Not too much, decent vibe, very multicultural, nice to watch the ball games if that is what one wants. Small space, but with some cozy seats.
Fun at South Fourth, nice interaction with Sarah, Kim, Nancy, Sara Wood, Andrew et. al. A little drunk, left feeling high and a bit excited. Would have gone yesterday, after play reading but was too tired.
Tonight, since I won't be ovewhelmed with exhaustion, which I would have been had I subbed, have the option of where to go. Winter's Tale at BAM, or South Fourth (my own Winter's Tale?)
Not sure, probably will decide after I leave the new student. So we will see.....

so here it is.....

Friday, and still no work. Today got a call from that relentless computer from DOE, offering me a job at Hunter Science High School in the mlk complex. Ofcourse I said no, even though I have since learned ( and probably knew before) that it is a great school, and I would have been pretty happy there. Then I sulk because Friends doesn't call me. What is it? What stops me? It is not even a question of money, though I would like to earn some, it is a question of time and energy, that I feel is being wasted.
Had a nice night at South Fourth last night, got invited to a Sunday concert at Rustic, a bar restaurant on the Bed-Stuy, Clinton Hill border. Sounds interesting, I will try to go. Something always positive happens when I go to South Fourth, or usually. Will try to see Architecting again tonight, then hang with Frank and the others. Will go to the two basketball games this afternoon, but when will this all end? Seem caught in a place, can't resolve working in a different venue then Friends. Two days scheduled for next week, two for the week after, will this lead to something more........weekend is promising.......

quite a weekend.......

really took advantage of the warm weather, walked from Nevins Street station to Outpost on saturday afternoon----read a bit at Outpost (nice cutting story from A. M. Homes) then "hung", while waiting for bus to Williamsburg on Classon and Fulton, southeast corner. There is an old bodega, that services the "reamaining" poor and black members of the community, quite a contrast from those hanging out at Outpost. Finally took that nice bus ride into Williamsburg, spent a little time at South Fourth, then returned home and finally to 113 (dive bar where my friends Bobby and wayne bartend on weekends.)
Sunday, good choice to go to Heights cafe, had good talk with Tom, will definitely try to see La Rondine, at Met to give him feedback, glad he is going to outside Baltimore, interesting to see how that turns out. Other operas too, Adriana, with Domingo, and Onegin, but who knows....time is always a factor. Again, so many choices with a little time. Sunday, after the Heights, walked to my bank from Montague and Hicks, to Nostrand and Fulton, and then, after the Bedford avenue bus would not stop for me, walked down Bedford to Myrtle---pure bed-stuy, but plenty of younger white people around, especially as I got close to Lafayette and DeKalb, Bedford really not that far away from say, Washington Ave, but seems like a long way. Good walk, followed by good camaraderie at South Fourth.
Finally, yesterday at Friends, teaching French, all to the good, feel very close to the kids, bus wasn't called today---may have to really consider days there falling off. Hopefully things will pick up; you will still have the warmth from the kids, but as far as time and money go...we will see

So what did I learn from...

yesterday. Well, that maybe my procrastination does have a point---ended up, after a slow and annoying afternoon at South Fourth around 5. Juliana very welcoming, then spent a really good four hours, had a great talk with a law student about the economic meltdown, then hung out with Nadia and Nancy, then stayed watched basketball and chatted with Patrick for a bit...only thing I could have done, felt very good afterwards. Could not have done this if I had accepted sub job; probably would have come home and spazzed out. It is the two out of three or one of out three dilemma. (description another time). Anyway, today found out that I had about $150.00 more in tax returns coming to me; a little more relaxed because of it. Will spend much of the day on the road, maybe hit outpost again.

of Scott and other things...

the Scott afternoon was wonderful; Bette Henritze, a very feisty Tammy Grimes, and Marian Seldes had great memories of Mr. Scott. I was amazed that none of the questions really focused on his theater work. My comment was the only one, again amazed at how much I remember---what to do........afterwards, decided not to wait to speak to Ms. Seldes, who I think I could have a rapport with. Why not?......Past versus present......? Not sure. Yesterday went to Think coffee, an enormous coffee place near NYU, packed with students and young people to hear Andrew Z. play his guitar. Pretty good, liked the place, you can read there and have coffee, and the woman next to me was a drama teacher and we had a good discussion.
But today, the continuing saga of my unwillingness to try a school that I don't know. This pattern seems to continue---why, I find new adventures interesting, and am sincerely interested in the dynamics of different schools. Yet I freeze when asked to commit. Want to know more info, but the computer voice is so deadly. Still, in two weeks there has been only one day of work at Friends. How can this be? Dont' know, but it is---have to get started soon...looking forward to tomorrow and next day, weather is supposed to be really good--maybe do a lot of walking, but what it comes down to is taking the risk...for some reason I am stopped...tonight at South Fourth, maybe answers, or maybe not.....

just contacted henry kahn through

facebook---first member of that class--1967---that played a major role in my life. Great picture, the guy looks so happy in an open sort of way. See what happens----anyway, yesterday, back at Friends, yes, everyone likes me there, no worry, so even if the work is less (I hope not!) you are still liked. Sunday, superbowl party at Alvin's; not many people I knew, but I think things turned out all right----probably better than at South Fourth, which was probably pretty noisy (non-Chekhovian). Rainy today, still planning to go to reading at Drama Book shop re George Scott biography---should be interesting, it was important to change tutoring date with Chelsea, since, in a way, I am a witness to his first work on stage----very important that I possibly might share something with the audience....we'll see.

so was it an amazing trip....

yesterday. Began because had to go to Amalgamated Bank of Fulton near Nostrand. At south fourth, moved to bus circle---freezing---bedford ave bus no where in sight...but there is the 46---an adventure bus. 46 warms us all up, then leaves, goes along Broadway, past the hospital, past Myrtle, a few more blocks down and then it makes the right turn on to Malcolm x boulevard, which will become Utica Ave by fulton street. Slow and dingy street, particularly dingy as we approach Fulton, strange because only a block over on Stuyvesant Street and slightly west are the "gold coast" houses of Bed Stuy, or like they like to call it, Stuyvesant Heights. Plan to take the subway back to Nostrand, but bus is right there, so travel down Fulton street to Nostrand, slow ride, plenty of time to observe commercial establishments on Fulton, all of which cater to working class people, very little presentation for new bed-stuy, more upscale (if that is the case) families. Finally, in the freezing cold, get off and get my money, then take next (and almost empty 25 bus past Classon, seeking Outpost, where I will try to read. Find Outpost, get off bus to return to it, first impression; the warm lighting, really beautiful, then get my bagel and coffee, read for about a half hour, one of the short story collection, then muse on my own stories in my head. Tremendous sense of being "distended" that is falling between two worlds, certainly a different aura then south fourth. The quiet---amazing! Then wander out quickly to F train, which is subbing for C train this weekend; f to Delancey, and then back on the J for my last trip to South Fourth to wish Kim a good trip. Circumnaviagating Brooklyn!

positively.....

amazed by all the choices tonight----probably will simply see the movie at Reade, and see what I feel after that. God it has become cold! Spent the morning and early afternoon at Brooklyn Library---always like it there---brooklyn, still so different, still so evocative to me and fascinating; many ideas going through my head. Walked, even in this weather (well, it has gotten colder recently) from Library to BAM; stopped off at Jimmy's on Washington Avenue for a nice tuna fish sandwich---like it there, though a little crowded at first, and the clientele now is a tribute to the gentrification of the neighborhood. Would love to ask the proprietor, who seems like a friendly person, to describe what I might see if I were to walk in maybe fifteen years ago (early 94, seems like yesterday)---probably totally different clientele.
Reading short stories, that is all that I seem to handle at this moment; actually read a really good one by Danielle Evans; should get number of South Fourth so that I can call Patrick today and say I am not going to be there....probably too cold.......

since my first post....

is now totally lost in cyber space, I will try to reinvent it. Nice talk with Nancy at South Fourth last night---first night out in five days---see how important it is to get out, Bob! Got a job at a school I desired (I guess that is the right way to put it) this morning, only to have the computer tell me it was not available when I accepted it.....odd? Weekend abounds in choices (pre- Sunday afternoon, ofcourse) many plays, operas, movies, etc. should be helped by thef fact that my unmeployment from November has finally come through, though still feeling a bit austere about money choices. Does all this make sense......would love to have a nice sub job at a (preferably) elementary school tomorrow, if Friends does not call. This afternooon, it will be time to tutor chelsea, then off to............

restless.....

well, I was this moring---surprised that I was not called by Friends; checked out the few schools that called me on insideschools, only one of them was good---what to do, want to earn some money this week---this keeps me restless, as I try to parcel out the rest of my priorities. Today, maybe Cherry Orchard, if I can see it cheap---possibly, if not a movie, must go out tonight--four straight days in---quite a lot for me. Weekend...? who is to say...Updike's death, what does it evoke in me, really enjoyed his short stories, may go back to them now, atleast one.....read them the summer of 88, right after the death of my mother---remember then.....? facebook, see old names from the past, what does that mean....? Stories to tell.....we'll see.......

second day no.....

work---a little restless, but, as I suspected, no work at Friends yet this week. Today got two calls from schools in Ridgewood that are supposed to be quite good---yet didn't take it---how long will I put this off? Sort of like dating, I tell myself, when you are doing well with one woman, but she doesn't need you every day, how do you relate to the newness of another. In this case, the woman is Friends. Anyway, nice session with Chelsea yesterday, will return today, then....maybe trek to brooklyn to see Cherry orchard, with the snow coming, should not be that crowded, or so I tell myself. Have stayed in last three days, very cold, time to move around...? Sorry that I will miss South fourth's superbowl party, but promised Alvin, and I will go there. Snow tomorrow, but also no tutoring, so it should be easier for me to accept work, or so I tell myself. We will see........

got Lanessa's e-mail...

about joining facebook and have gone through a flurry of motions to join, and not stay on the old facebook account that was opened and that I thought I had closed. Anyway, the new one, just another communication vehicle...how many of them are there....how many of them are needed...is there no privacy at all....I can see that one could simply live one's life there.
Three days at Friends after all---pretty good...except for that crazay day on Thursday,that will be remedied, saw Architecting last night, then hung out with Frank and Libby, lots of fun, good conversation, will probably go to the documentary and discussion tonight, though I probably would really enjoy the Philharmonic, still after tutoring Martha in the Bronx, should show my political interest by attending this documentary and discussion at Chrystie Street---still a little shook up over the facebook incident---but hope all will be well now........tomorrow, maybe South Fourth

Monday....

still off, no tutoring---no subbing yet at Friends for tomorrow, hope that I am called, would like to participate, probably lots of work at DOE, but not sure that I want to do it. Just have to let it happen. Finished Epilogue, the book by Anne Roiphe, very evocative at moments, other times, very repetitive and self-sorrying-still she captures the sad essence of a person being cut off from routine, lifestyle and attention that she had for the past 38 years. Political aspect.....? Well, that is something different.
Yesterday, finally after a couple of really tired hours, got myself up to go to South Fourth---glad I did, enjoyed watching the game with Chris, it was quiet but I felt very much at home there. A good choice, better than a movie---left, the snow was falling, but there was a beautiful sense of things, the cold had been removed, it was really easy to walk around, a nice calm on the south side of Williamsburg. Took J train, then F then 2 back home,not difficult at all, even if kind of late. Stopped in to see Leila at Bembe; she was very sweet, but could not stay because it was really crowded and I did not want to drink anything. Wow! You would think with the recession, or whatever, business would be slow, especially on a snowy night, but Bembe was full.
Tonight, probably back to South Fourth, then return......

what now.....

Sunday morning, not much energy---could not decide what to do,,,so I am here in the computer shop, doing my blog. Yesterday-----interesting Starbucks on 145 street and Bradhurst Ave.---a mixture of homeboys, white intellects, hispanic families, very mixed. Under the new "luxury" building that covers all of 145 street between Bradhurst and Eighth Avenue. Think I may go visit again today---or perhaps not-----yesterday, visited Bronx Museum---short trip, then took Concourse Bus north on Concourse---still looks pretty grim around there---interesting---no coffee places (not even a Dunkin Donuts) until Fordham Road----did not check the large commerical streets that interesect with the Concourse, there must be some there...still, so barren...later saw Neal's play, knew from the beginning that it would be ragged---so many male on male variations----fanciful but how much can one take. Tired of playwrights who are indulged by their directors, et. al. Reading Anne Roiphe's memoir, actually finished it---some very poignant passages about functioning as one, after a death after a long and successful marriage. However other passages extremely self-indulgent. And the dating online-----well, I suppose she has to, while you have people and things coming at you at almost all times. Don't feel much like a play today, and as for a movie----simply can't get excited about going, still lots of things to do next week---would like to see Cherry Orchard sometime soon. Will probably end up at South Fourth, which I think is important today---have not been there for about a week, because of work and the cold....need to check in....still have not returned to Annie at Heights since that nice Friday evening during Christmas vacation. Thought of E.L. Doctorow yesterday, as the bus in the Bronx crossed the jagged beginning of Weeks Avenue, as it intersected with the Concourse---sometimes I wish I could just get in a bus and travel through the borough....(why can't you?) Anyway, reference is to Danny in Doctorow's book, The Book of Daniel, which is about growing up communist in the Bronx in the thirties and forties. Anyway, let's stop now---later!

last night at the....

ballet-----can't say I enjoyed Coppelia, it has many static moments---but was able to see the ballet as a compilation of Balanchine's vision of dance, up to that point. He still had some strong ballets in him: Union Jack; Chaconne, Tziganne, Vienna Waltzes and Capriccio Espagnole, but the steps in Coppelia, really seem to sum up what he had done up to then. Well, if a bit too impersonally, danced. Enjoyed being in State (not Koch) theater; certainly it was useful to have it to go to on a cold Friday evening. Amazingly, the theater was more than three quarters filled, on this, the coldest night of this or any (possible) year.
Other than that, a good week at Friends, now on to Bronx Museum of the Arts, then......

at Bath Beach....

amazing what a day of subbing and challenges at 163 does for my ego. A day later am totally exhuasted. After the day at 163, went to Friends for a basketball game. Yet there is something about the chemistry and relationships and at 163 that makes me feel very fulfilled. Hope to continue----could be a nice antidote to Friends, once a week, say. But still no awareness how often they will call me. Also more relaxed financially, after doing the work.
What else: Glad I saw Spring Awakening on Wednesday----really changed a lot, many good discussions will come from it---will see probably two plays today, amish project at Cherry Lane, finally will see it and not take tickets for it, and probably will go to La Femme at Coil festival at 10. Don't know how the snow will effect plans, would rather go to La Femme on another day, but only two other options are on tutoring days, and I could be very tired if I sub as well. So there you have it---my body aches! but I think it was worth it.

difficult day....

surprisingly worked two days at Friends, but here it is my first day off, and I am feeling a little down. Really tired from the trip to the Bronx for the last two days, but feeling a little stronger now. Spring Awakening, tonight, should be fun...havn't seen it in a while---what else---well can't decide whether to comment on Company or not---sometimes the whole musical comedy thing seems so trivial---other times valuable, can't make up my mind---may pick up some scripts today from Paula---sorry to be so formalistic---it is bothersome switching between arts and politics---sometimes too much infomration---well, we'll see.

so here I....

Saturday morning in the lincoln center library-----rest of the day spent watching football at South Fourth? Place has definetely become a haven for me---should be greatful...had a nice time for a short time at Bembe yesterday evening after South Fourth, lots of energy---a nice talk with the wife of one of the dj's, then a horrendous subway ride back to manhattan, the urge to pea was intense, hasn't happened like that in a while, simply one beer...? proud of myself for going to a new place, anyway, when the train seemed to stop outside of 1st avenue, like forever, wondered if I was going to make it----I did, found restroom on seventeenth and third, and then needed to go urgently again; was able to slip in to an Appleby's on 50 street, good to remember, the woman at the door was incredibly nice---give her a lot of credit. what about today...? still on a money kick, so will try not to see anything this afternoon----anything else---went to party at Ron and Liz' on Thursday--spent a long time talking to Laura Saenger about Friends and a few other things----good conversatsion, made the time go fast, afterwards talked a while with Liz and Ron---I really enjoyed that; many memories about the past and my old classmate Susan Mann, who lived in the same building that Liz did when she was little. Yes, Sue was always kind of fascinating to me---attracted to her, even if Judy M., who I craved when a senior in high school (that's right, craved) was her best friend. The two of them were always together. For a boy from the Bronx, they, and a few others, but mostly they, were certainly my "green light at the end of the dock". Where are they now...? Sue married Mathew Chamlin (who I never met) probably still lives in Westchester, Judy married a guy who lived in Canada, reintroduced herself to me once in spring 1979---did not remember my "hunger" for her, was very friendly, while I was trying to put together my hunger from the past, with my notations from the present. She looked kind of pale, wondered if she or Sue would come to reunion of 2001, but they didn't---image of Sue and Eddie Bernstein, her boy friend at Science, boy was I what...jealous, anyway the image remains...let's see what happens for ther rest of the day......