two days....

Friday: rest until around 4. then off to Brooklyn. Stops at Center for Fiction and Arts Library, across the  mstreet. No Brooklyn library card...a blessing or a curse---but can't take anything out. Then off to really what I came to Brookyn for---to participate in the "action" outside 130 Greene Street protesting a brutal and ugly deed theft. 

First image: walking east on Greene to the house---a warm feeling---the streets from Greene's beginning to around Waverly avenue have become a "never-never" land--safe, beautiful Brownstones---mostly white people who seemed affluent, walking the streets. Many mothers with children. Was this neighborhood ever different...I asked myself. Yet when speaking to the woman whose building was taken from her by fraud, she explained that when she bought the building in 1997, most houses on the block were boarded up. Hard to believe---try to imagine a "different" much more "rougher" Clinton Hill. Difficult. I remained at the action for about an hour---joined by mostly black protesters decrying the possibility of more deed thefts like this one, and claiming that there was no real assistance from elected officials. Some interesting conversations with the activists---however, directly east on the corner of Waverly and Greene, was an upscale restaurant--some outdoor diners right next to the protesters--no reaction from them. It occurred to me that after participating in the protest---shouting "what do we want..? Justice"; "When do we want it? Now", I could easily walk into the restaurant and have a nice meal---joining the "members of the community"---mostly white, I am afraid, and forget where I had just been. I did not think that most of the protesters who were black, would feel comfortable in that restaurant, or even consider going there.  It is this juxtaposition that I see often when I visit neighborhoods that have been gentrified in the last twenty years (has it been that long...? Yes)  So where am I in this?

Did not make the choice to eat next door--instead took the Gates Avenue bus about 10 blocks and ate at Fulton Bar, a friendly bar-restauarant n ear BAM. Had a nice Caesar Salad--very friendly bartender and watched the beginning of the Yankee-Brave game. Then it was time to return home to Manhattan.

Yesterday---the residue of energy from Friday caught up with me---so I had what I would call a "passive" day--stayed mostly around the apartment. Free movie at a Church about 10 blocks down---"The Way We Were"---decided to see it. Nice choice---not very crowded---big screen--movie was interesting---I had seen it on TV about 45 years ago---but seemed to go one forever---from episode to episode. Walked home from the Church--about 10 blocks--no stamina issue---bought my food and returned home.

today---would like to return to Brooklyn--maybe catch a "real" movie--we will see.

follow up...

did not see Familiar Touch yesterday. Not enough energy after my visit to Drama Bookstore. Spent about 2 hours there--first reading much of Grover Dale's autobiography and then---after a bout of restlessness, looking closely at The Merchant of Venice. Are the two related...? I doubt it. Dale is one of the last surviving members of the original cast of WSS---the Merchant...? Well, I am fascinated by its structure. Three stories, interwoven. Shylock destroyed---and then forgotten. 

The infusion and its fourth day effect tired me---so I returned to the apartment after the Drama Book Store visit.  Intermitten naps for the rest of the day---strange when your body tells you what it wants you to do, rather then your telling "it". Finished the free weekend of baseball on the web---sort of had enough of it---and continued to read my English history book. 

Today a possible tutoring session--also, planning to pick up my Ostomy supplies from the drug store I go to in Harlem. Interesting trip---the store is on 122nd and 3rd Avenue--I usually take the crosstown bus to 79th and Madison---then wait for the bus that goes north on Madison, all the way to 122 street. Amazing contrast of course, in the two worlds that it covers, but more and more, north of 96, there are signs of gentrification. New library on 125th east of 3rd---might want to check it out. Always feel a sense of "triumph" after I receive the supplies, and embark on my return to my "safe" apartment on the upper west side. 

the rest of the day---the sure---early now--lots of time to get through before my journey east, 

Listening to Mozart this morning...

totally alone--my mind shot back to summer of 67--in an apartment much like the one I am living in now---spending most of my free time listening to as much Mozart as I could. 67: my third "reconstructive" summer---I am beginning a new job as a social worker---my plan to take part time jobs while I "audition" for roles has failed me---finally I work nights in the post office on 33rd and 8th--for about seven months---read a lot during the day---realize that this structure is not working--it is cutting me off from things I need---like sex---and relationships. Where has all the promise of my last year at Hopkins gone? Now the freshmen men from Hopkins and the women from Goucher who started in 63, and were so important in my final year at Hopkins have all graduated--have I given them up competely? No. But I know there is no world for me with them. So who I am now?  And it is hot! All those things come together for me as I sit and listen to a Mozart violin sonata in the present. Differences...similarities....who can say.

Infusion three days ago--yesterday could not do much after the morning---body needed to rest after the infusion and its inability to let me sleep on the day it is given. Spending most of the day reading a non fiction book about the lives of Richard the II and his cousin, Henry Bolingbroke, who later becomes King Henry IV. Filling in a lot of what I already know from Shakespeare's two plays bout those to. Tied to the book---can't read anything else---kept me going last night. 

Plans for ttoday: should try to see Familiar Touch, the movie at Film Forum, which stars KC--a lovely woman and incredibly well respected actress, as an aging women with Alzheimers. Would like to stop by Drama Bookstore as well--spend about an hour there checking out some new plays--don't know if that is possible. And Brooklyn....just not sure what my energy level will be. It is easy for me to get really lost in the reading I am doing--want the summer to be interesting...well, we will see.