and so, today.....

third day of the week at Friends....fairly easy day---bumping into people.......wrote a letter to Gale Brewer about money for Atlantic Yards, while money for education is being eliminated...continue not to "see anything", maybe I will break the schneid today---maybe go to South Fourth,,,havn't even been to Williamsburg in five days---is that some kind of record? But what else......can't seem to think of anythng---well...let's continue.......

nice day at.....

Friends....really happy here......got another days's work for next Thursday---that's really good, now I can relax about Monday and Tuesday of next week if I wish, or maybe even (God forbid") get a job with DOE (don't bet on it!) What else---not sure about the evening, the everpresent Walkieure beckons, but is it too much of a Deja Vu---God, I remember those Von Karajan performances in 67-68 as if it were yesterday---do I really have something to learn by listening to Maazel and his cast? That first Walkieure performance was the afternoon that I met Pat---turned out to be momentous---remember she said once that she tried not to listen to what I was saying that afternoon---wow! really stuck it out to be with her---but great memories of our time together. Anyway, those are the issues now, we'll see what happens.......

about wss....

Wanted to listen to Podcast of the oringinal reunion a little while ago, but didn't do it; Past vs. Present---always seems to be the rule---conflict is all...anyway, a good session with Brandon today, even if I did have to sit around waiting for 1P.M. to leave---was worth it---with all the work I have at Friends, don't know if I will see him again this week---hope he can hold on to what he has learned---now, at Internet place---a little anxious to get back to the present and not listen to the WSS podcast at this moment, but want to hear it soon---tonight---maybe see Frank's play at 122, but maybe not...so many options...a pleasant meal last night with PK and her friend Bruce---enjoyed being with them...well, life will reveal what follows......

Today with.....

Wow! Formally invited to two superbowl parties, and still a week left! Things are looking up! Will I go to both? It is a long way from Harlem to Williamsburg---may just stay at Alvin's---still...yesterday's calm after one and a half basketball games at Friends, and a long subway ride, was interrupted by a call from my half sister-in-law PK. The result is that I will meet her and her current boy friend at O'Neill's this afternoon after they go to the opera. Don't know what to expect---more to report later----will probably return home soon, and listen to the end of the opera (barber). After that......who can say.....?

back at Friends....

After two days--nice to be back---looking forward to the (atleast) four days next week---read Anna Ditkoff's study of murder in Baltimore today----very sad---what is to be done? neighborhoods in the city (baltimore. that is) would like to travel around and explore each one, get a sense of boundaries---very exhilirating--much work to be done, to be contributed----but how? What to do this evening, and the rest of the weekend, again numerous possibilities, but so many factors, including my tiredness this evening---anyway, will be continued.......

since then.....

so I finally did see a movie on Monday---I'm Not There, "Dylan"movie---extraordinary film making, but really more about each shot rather than shedding any insight into Dylan. Left me feeling "What?" Anyway, yesterday some nice work at Friends, and then a good session with Chris at his house---Harlem, looks like its being taken over by these gigantic buildings along the eighth avenue corridor---very dispiriting. Needed a lot of rest, got it, but still feel on non-work days that I don'thave enough to do---tutoring with Lena cancelled until tomorrow, as of now no work for tomorrow; should I accept a public school job? I ask myself that as I hope for Friends to have something for me. Speaking of Friends---Jamey asked me to sub for two days in February, but those days are taken---makes me feel kind of frustrated. Still, a lot of (four so far) work there next week, and some the week after so........as for rest of day....lots of choices, (as usual) but will probably end up at South Fourth Street. Okay, that is all......

Monday...

Got the word today that work at FRiends Wednesday was cancelled....still have tomorrow and Friday, and next week three....should not be too much of a problem...read good review of a bio of Bernard Malamud this morning---very interesting, the Jewish life of the sixties and its anticedents---memories that are familiar to me, yet not of my family...being kind of vague here, anyway have "gotten through" the past two days---mostly at South Fourth, have to admit I had a good time watching the games yesterday, though it got a little long...glad I found that place---today, maybe finally a movie (or maybe even two) or maybe not, the cold limits my wanderlust, but it is not "that" cold...the WSS tapes on utube yesterday---reallay moving, how soon to return to them, and what about the library of Congress visit---you really must do it, cityboy, but how...and when, and what about the freedom issue (that is, do I contact Bob R, or do I stay at a hotel, and make the night "mine". Well, these are things to be dealt with...later.....

a day in kindergarden

And you thought that yesterday at the public school at York Avenue, would have been "fun"?
After this, I think we had better redefine our definition of fun. Yesterday got the kindergarden class at 163---very frenetic--nice kids individually,but together------very hard. Yet I did it---everything is so immediate when you sub in a situation like that. Will try to relax this weekend, but "how"? Already had trouble with the bank---out two dollars, atleast---well, on to South Fourth! Enjoy the cold, cityboy........

mellow....mellow...mellow.....

cityboy is truly mellow....no pressure today---could have worked at the school on York Avenue, probably would have been pretty nice, but essentially decided to rest up until tomorrow, for the long day at 163. First time there in a while---will take some getting used to, still I am glad that I am doing it. About the rest of the day....well, big decision seems to be whether to go to the Film Forum, or to Lincoln Center Jewish festival---things really have calmed down. That's it for now....

happy at last......

Returned to Friends this morning, felt very welcome---got some extra work---spoke to Monica and got some idea of when she will need me---also found out that the one day I chose to work at 163---I Would Not Have Been Called to Work at Friends Anyway!---luck seems to have turned around---good fortune is coming my way. Now, if I can just relax a bit, and go with the flow, all will be fine, and I can enjoy the long weekend. Nothing more for now.........

laurents...lang, and

While waiting for the computer at lincoln Center library, read a little bit of Arthur Laurents' biography---part devoted to Harold Lang, the dancer. Described in his early life as extremely promiscuous---had affairs with both men and women---this was the Harold Lang who my father talked about and admired constantly---but look at the difference! My father kept his vision controlled, lived to see all of them (did he?) but his life with my mom and us was totally real. No promiscuity there at all...but in Lang's life...affairs with many...how do you cross that bridge---my theater stories were told in this apartment house in the bronx---totally non-chaotic--yet the world---struck by the contrast---Land died young and burned out from his alcoholism. Connections, connections.....

Tuesday...not a good......

Got tired yesterday after the Preminger movie---(it was great,by the way, the one with Laurence Tibbett---the Milton Berle one fell flat, and I left in the middle) then returned home to sleep and spend the rest of the night moving in and out of sleep. Did not get called again today from Friends, and though it is only the second day of the second week---feel left out. Then expected a call from Monica W, about next week, but have not heard from her yet...so that is up in the air---then this morning got a late call from 163, would have loved to go, but in no state---that is the problem with computer calling, I can't call them and ask if I can come in late, etc.
Got my check from Jenni's group, but that is scant consalation-will tutor Chris tonight at 6, which should be nice, but until then.....a lot of energy not used, don't like to be passive, and that is the problem.
Well, let's see what happens after this...........

So what really happened?

Not much! returned home feeling very tired and slept, then spent the rest of the day around the apartment, feeling tired. That is good---feel much better today---but no work, however apartment is being cleaned. Browsing in Barnes and Noble today, looked at New Yorker, noticed a short article on Bloomberg by David Remnick, the head of the New Yorker. He calls Bloomberg's term "stellar" Unbelievable! Are these people so myopic---don't they realize that he runs his government just like Bush, and then he says race relations are "better". But yesterday, on the radio in the evening, was a whole hour devoted to cop abuse of black and latino youth in places like Bushwick and such. Doesn't Remnick, as an educated new yorker feel the need to explore this? Doesn't he read Nat Hentoff? The problem is, this attitude is shared by so many people like him--it is such a limited vision. Wanted to write him a letter (even a kind one) but was nervous about it.
Rest of the day? We will see........

what now cityboy?...

The city is ours!, or mine, however you wish to call it; no tutoring today--maybe Tuesday. A little calmed down after yesterday's post re Atlantic Yards, but what will happen? Do we think the unthinkable? A city with apartment for the wealthy just spreading out at every corner? So what happens to ordinary people? Should go to Freddy's at some point, talk to them. Seems I scrupulously avoid it.
Yesterday spent most of day at South Fourth---not quite a disaster--made some new friends, but....wanted to go to East River to check on Sara, but again got tired early (ofcourse I got up early) and just went home.
What about today. Missed Face Value on AE, do I want to spend $20.00.? Probably should go to the O'Neill readings at 2, should be fun. Still a part of me would like to get on the bus going east on 145 and stay on it as it zig zags its way down Southern Boulevard in the Bronx. See the whole thing. Many movies, South Fourth, Julie at Toast? Cityboy moves on.....

The meaning of life.....

A good day at Friends yesterday---would tell you my schedule, but you wouldn't believe it---exhuasted afterwards, but in a good way---did not hear Jeanine's boyfriend play Wednesday, too tired, but will visit her today. South Fourth and Football...a few moments ago, sounded like fun---then read about the Judge's dismissal of the Atlantic Yards suit---will be contested further...but What Is To Be Done.....I have never felt more activist, even as I am aware how many ways of escape are built in to this--through the arts---etc. How much passivity should one accept? Well, give it a shot---see whether there is a place in this world for militancy---and who is the enemy, anyway, the city is filled with complacent people--anyway, do I still want to just simply watch football and "clear my mind" this afternoon? Anyway, complicated---we will continue......

Today (wednesday)

hard day at Friends yesterday---seemed to be climbing everywhere---body seemed really shot after the day ended--back on Friday for Rochelle--woke up this morning with really nothing left---got one or two actually decent choices from DOI, but rejected them---much too tired--day went slowly--read one nice play for Jenni's theater---then generally felt exhausted all morning---tutor Lena this afternoon, then possibly on to South Fourth to hang with Jeannine and see her boyfriend Patrick play with his band at Zebuolon---which I have never been to---alot depends on the tiredness factor--well, body just wasn't used to that kind of work over the vacation---we will see what happens......

today....

returned to friends for a shortened day---tomorrow will be much longer---got to love those kindergarden kids---very creative and full of energy--now that the work is over---sort of down---read article in Post, actually debunking Bloomberg---is it possible, then on to cityroom of NY TImes and a horrible post on Gowanuslounge.blogspot.com about the city's continuing disenfranchisement of people in the way of Yankee Stadium or real estate in the South Slope--meanwhile he sits blithely in Oklahoma, stating the other candidates are not real enough. Incredible! And yet there is so little feeling against him, except in concentrated places. Will I go to one of the Develop Don't Destroy events? Might be a good idea. Anyway, work continues to be fun at Friends---nice day at play for Coyote Ugly people---tutoring tonight---and then....

Saturday and things....

Yesterday arrived at South Fourth by way of Bed-Stuy--took the C train to Clinton Washington---then stopped at Outpost (awfully whitebreaddy, considering it seems to be surounded by poor people)----then walked to Bedford and Fulton---had one hundred limited busses, going to Williamsburg, pass me by, finally took a local bus which ended at Flushing Avenue, still like that ride down Bedford, checking out all the "revoloutionary" streets--Flushing Avenue quite a contrast---the hasidic neighborhood is beginning, all quiet, went into an old old home to use the bathroom---right in the heart of Hasidic Williamsburg---didn't know if they would take me in---but they did---then spent the rest of the day at South Fourth---how much time am I actually spending there?....wanted to see a movie, but could not do it all---today, will go to TNC to see the South Fourth------Coyote Ugly staff do their play---price a little steep but will do it---they have been very nice to me----Brandon canceled today---no tutoring--is test next week or this?
Tomorrow back to Friends, a fairly easy day, then marathon on Tuesday, and Friday, who knows? Some other days, we'll see...it will be nice to be back there..........

Friday...Friday

What did we accomplish today? Well, no calls from DOE; so does that mean that DOE has taken me off their list? Only day to work is Friday at 163---looking forward to it---but hope that Friends doesn't need me for that day---as it turns out, probably will get five requests from Friends.....then let the fire inspector into the basement and accompanied him---almost should be payed by the rental company, then down to pick up scripts from Paula for Jenni's summer group---did not expect 11 plays, but took them---that may be all---interesting conversation with a woman named willa yesterday in O'Neal's, well that is what you came for, wasn't it? Turns out she is a successful producer--sent her to Gowanuslounge blog...what happens now, what next? Will probably go to South Fourth tonight and hang with Jenny and Juliane--had fun last Friday when I "courted" Sonya---anyway she (Sonya) will be back soon enough--what about a movie?...seem to be asking myself that question endlessly the last few days...still have not seen anything...later.....

today....thursday

Wanted to see the movie Arranged, but tutored Brandon, instead...he, of course, forgot his English work---hopefully this will not obstruct us too much towards the test on next Tuesday. tutoring holds real challenges for me---I do get off on the excitement of it---also, reserved a Friday at 163,which I wanted, but hopefully will not be a conflict with Friends. No other calls for today from DOE, I wonder if this is because all teachers are there, or because they realize I turned down so many jobs previously, they are simply not calling me---actually would enjoy working in a school tomorrow....we will see.

New Year's Eve and after......

The good and the bad about the eve: the good: saw Patrick, a denizen of South Fourth when I came in around 7:00; we had only been cordial before, but had a really good conversation with him for about half an hour. Nice bonding---then went to see Susan play at Trash bar--which, actually is a really cool dirty bar (amazing how many bars in the burg, and how atleast on the surface, different they are)---don't really enjoy the loud music, but it was good to touch base with Susan, and I know she is very appreciative---afterwards a brief conversation with her about my old haunt: 131---still miss the place---seems a little more orderly now then when I left---anyway, a good experience. Then back to South Fourth---got there around 11:00P.M., not a lot of conversation, sat with a guy named Nick, his friend Zack, and a woman who seemed like Zack's date, named Jill---the moment arrived, not much feeling and then I left around 1A.M.
Woke up dissappointed but felt healthy---then it happened: pain in both legs when I left the house for coffee, and then the right leg pain (left let went away) for the whole day. Never has happened before-----still I went to Ron and his wife's party---they are very generous people, had two sets of conversation----met a couple and an older woman and discussed things with them; not very political---did not seem upset by what has happening in the city---felt dissappointed--can one build a relationship with anyone who actually beleives all this building is to the good? Anyway, that was saved by the entrance of Annie, and her folks Peter and Laura, who I had not met before, but with whom I had long conversations with---very fulfilling.
Returned home, no movie, no call from DOE (though I would not have accepted a job anyway) slept in fits and starts---one moment especially difficult as it seemed I was not tired, but was too late for a movie, and I was too full for a beer---but I persevered and got through it.
This morning, turned off DOE computer, then dealt with the leg pain, seems to be getting better, Arlene from downstairs seems to think it could be a muscle tare---I will go with that now, do not seem too incapacitated---hopefully things will improve, rest of the day.......?